|PE 1460 

.S2 
I Copy 1 



m 



THE 

WLGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

OF THE 

ENGLISH LANGUAGE, 

CONTAINING ALSO 

GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, J TAUTOLOGICAL PHRASES, 
'ORTHOEPICAL READINGS, | ASPIRATION OF B. 
TOGETHER WITH 

A CRITICAL PREFACE 

ON 
STAGE PRONUNCIATION. 



*Omnis fere indoctus, sapientissimus est dtim tacet : 
Sermonem celans, lit morbum turpissitnum. 



PRINTED BY T. S. PORTER, 

108, 

BRITANNIA STREET, CITY ROAD, LONDON. 







^5 



PREFACE. 



There is perhaps no language that sub- 
scribes so fittle to the laws of a settled and well 
regulated orthoepy as the English ; for which 
reason, it is not only extremely difficult for 
strangers to pronounce, but it is also much ob- 
structed in its diffusion among foreign nations. 
From a similar cause it arises that Englishmen 
themselves are not agreed upon the pronuncia- 
tion of many words which are left to scamper 
about society " to find a local habitation and a 
name;" having no claim by the laws of settle- 
ment either upon London, Dublin, or Edinburgh. 
This want of fixity creates an everlasting con- 
tention, and leaves to the arbitrary caprice of in- 
dividuals a power, in which the ignorant assume 
a right of claim equally forcible with that of 
the learned ; and in which barbarism and vul- 
garity so far prevail, as to render the contention 
<&f ambiguous determination. 



U PREFACE, 

Systems upon systems have been published 
as correctives of the evil, but they have only 
added mazes to labyrinths : who shall say why 
youth arcl mouth, toll and extol, later and wa- 
ter, prologue and prorogue, mead and dead, 
patron and matron, prosecutor and executor 
should deviate from each other in pronuncia- 
tion ? and in other instances, so bizarre are cer- 
tain words, that we have no sounds by which 
we can transmit their proper utterance. The 
word bosom is neither bo-zum nor boo-zum both 
of which are gross vulgarisms ; but it is a sound 
different from either, which we are quite unable 
to teach or shew upon paper. Casually, azure, 
menagerie are words of a like kind. How shall 
we shew in writing the sound of these words ? 
neither hash, kazh, kajh, kadj nor any combina- 
tion will effect the object. The difference of 
sound in roiv to row a boat, and bow to make 
obeisance, it is impossible to define to a 
foreigner by writing. The tendency of all that 
has been written upon the subject, instead of 
relieving the difficulty, has shewn beyond all 
doubt the utter impossibility of remedying the 
evil, and the perfect impracticability and 
inutility of all the ingenious schemes that 



PREFACE, 111 

have been laid before the public for that 
purpose. The consequence of this irregularity 
is, that vulgarisms and inproprieties form in 
parlance the distinguishing features and marked 
deformities in our language ; and our unfortu- 
nate ears are doomed not only to excruciate in 
the torments of bad grammar, but to agonize un- 
der the torture of a vickmsness of expression and 
a corruption of phraseology, the ridiculousness of 
which alone saves us from the death with which 
we are frequently threatened. If we find that 
the better portion of society be not free from 
these defects, we shall have less reason for as- 
tonishment, in observing that they abound with 
persons whose circumstances have exiled them 
from the path of education, and whose- occupa- 
tions prevent them from associating study with 
their more immediate interests. There exist 
few, however, perhaps none, who do not feel a 
degree of eonscious satisfaction in being relieved 
from literary error, and it is under this convic- 
tion, that the anthor has compiled the most no- 
torious barbarisms, in order that the reader 
beholding himself as in a glass, may be enabled 
to remove with facility the maculae which he 
will find thereby to disfigure him. Many per- 



sons a fleet an indifference upon the subject q£ 
pronunciation ; but this is the flimsy disguise of 
negligence and ignorance : a thousand masks- 
would be incapable of concealing the convulsive 
expression of its mortification, or the blushes of 
its shame and confusion. Is the croaking' of the 
raven comparable to the chant of the nightin- 
gale? Is a tainted breath preferable to the 
odour of the rose ? Is filth to be regarded be- 
fore cleanliness ? or pestilence to health ? We 
hesitate not to aver, that a man whose collo- 
quy is vitiated by barbarisms, is a nuisance 
which affects the nostrils of every man of 
taste, and of whom society desires most 
anxiously to be purged. Against whom the 
4C odi profanum" is the universal watchword,, 
and who is very properly condemned to aban- 
don the paths of men, and to seek the haunts of 
that class of beings to which he has attached 
himself, Perhaps one of the most emphatic 
sentences that escaped from the eloquent and 
elegant pen of Cicero was i Hoquereut videam" 
speak that I may know you. This is the power- 
ful criterion of mind, the stamped and acknow- 
ledged letter of credit, the talisman that will 
enforce admiration or beget contempt ; that 



will produce esteem or preclude friendship; that 
will bar the door or make portals fly open. A 
good orthoepy and a careful and appropriate 
diction are the primary signs of something that 
is cultivated and worthy; and in any man be he 
old or young, whatever may be his station in so- 
ciety, these will never fail of producing impres- 
sions in his favour. To neglect any study 
which will render us more useful or agreeable 
members of society, is to manifest an extremely 
corrupt taste; and not to do all we can to 
advance the age in which we live and to hand 
it with glory and honour to posterity, is to 
confess ourselves out of the pale of civilized 
life. Let every young man strive to indue 
himself with correct language : the first step to 
which is to discard all mean and vulgar expres- 
sions: destitute of this important advantage, 
however otherwise well informed, he will put his 
auditors to suffering" : he will resemble a creak- 
ing" wheel which although very useful, is also 
very tormenting. 

It should be recollected by all persons 
who have not received and who for that reason 
contemn education, that they carry with them a 
treacherous associate, which in despite of the 



most powerful armour, the best devised disguise?., 
and their most forcible efforts, will certainly let 
their secret escape. An associate that no 
entreaty will mitigate, no affection will soften, 
no faith will bind; an associate that will at 
each instant proclaim their vulgarity ; whose 
voice cannot be stifled by prayer, induced 
by bribery, or deterred by menace — that asso- 
ciate is the tongue. It is therefore important 
to ascertain the improprieties to which we are 
compelled at preseut to succumb, in order 
that expression may be the more speedily 
liberated from the shackles which encumber 
and enfeeble it. Conversation will be thus ren- 
dered more intellectual and pleasing; and a 
fixity will be given to language, which will 
be more permanent and durable in proportion 
to the correction of error and the diffusion of 
that correction. Every man of sense will 
spare no exertion to. divest himself of habits so 
hostile to a respectable position in society, and 
so militative to that exalted place which a 
civilised being, should occupy: recollecting 
always that inasmuch, as he eradicates error in 
himself he will impedev its diffusion by his own 
example, and that the improprieties of speech 






will vanish in the same proportion in which we 
can obtain proselytes to reason and education. 
To speak without error depends upon a know- 
ledge of the principles of grammar: to pronounce 
words. improperly is a defect of education and a 
consequence of illiterate society. The former 
is difficult to attain where taste does not pre- 
vail over the feelings of habit, and where the 
mind is compelled to secede to the force of 
brutism: the latter may be alleviated with a 
small degree of attention to the incongruities 
that are assembled in this work, and which 
have been concatenated for the instruction and 
improvement of that class who are desirous of 
correcting those discrepancies of language 
which a want of education has imposed upon 
them. 

To a person who is anxious of assuming a 
i proper attitude in colloquy or oratorVj orthoepy 
is of grand importance; a blunder of this kind 
in conversation will turn the finest reasoning into 
laughter and ridicule*, while in oratory it will- 
completely deprive the speaker of that respect 
(and attention which he should possess from hisr 
auditors. Aristophanes openly ridiculed j£schi~ 
*es for a false pronunciation, Burke was laughed 



at for a similar reason ; and besides the great 
advantage produced by a propriety of expres- 
sion and an accurate orthoepy there is another 
of no unimportant kind, which is, that when 
once the mind is induced to pursue one plea- 
sure of a higher order, it is set upon the race 
of greater things, and will continue to ascend ; 
but the mind that nothing can excite to elevate 
itself will not remain stationary, but will des- 
cend in a progressive ratio until it can hardly 
be recognized or denominated human. 

facilis descensus Averni, 



Sed revocare gradum, superasque evadere ad auras 
Hie labor, hoc opus est* 

The descent into hell is easy 5 but to recall your j 
steps and ascend to the upper regions, forms the labour j 
and the difficulty. 

But it is not to the uneducated class that 1 
this neglect of their vernacular tongue is alone 1 
attributable: the carelessness pervades the 
higher branches of society, and we know many 
who would feel ashamed of a false quantity in 
Greek or Latin that are absolutely incapable of 
reading with propriety an English newspaper. 



The stage has little authority with regard 
to pronunciation, and its affectations will be 
carefully avoided by every person of good taste :• 
burd lor beard, aitches for aches, Karto for 
Cato, rallery for raillery, kwality for quolity, 
(quality) Room for Rome, and very many 
others are vulgarisms of the theatre, and find 
disciples only among those whose minds are of 
the same grade as the histrion whom they 
imitate — they are knights of the unknown 
tongue. Was it in the reading of such couplets 
as the following that John Kemble adopted the 
word burd} 

And yet by authors 'tis averr'd 

He made use only of his beard, (burd) 

This equal shame and envy stirr'd 

I'th' enemy that one should beard, (burd) 

But other examples existed to correct ami 
to shew the erroneousness of this notion. 

Insulted and revil'd and jeer'd 

With rude invasion of his beard.— Hud-. 

Could when their profits interfer'd 

©et quarter for each others beard. —Hud. 



Whereby in sleep men are disturb'd or fear'd 
Let those be ehief and wear a golden beard.— I&L 

I'll take her father by the beard, 
I'll challenge all her kindred ; 
Each dastard soul shall stand afeard. 
My wrath shall no more be hindered. 

Bel. o/Anc. Poetry,. 

We look behind ; then view his shaggy beard, 
His clothes were tagg'd with thorns, and filtlu his 
limbs besmear'd. — Dry. Vir. 

And I will believe him worthy of the- beard 

And hair of our forefathers — less is fear'd. — H. X 

A comet and without a beard, 

Or star that ne'er before appear'd.— Hud. 

Similar instances might be multiplied to 
shew that the word heard had always- the same 
sound that it now possesses, and it will appear 
perhaps astonishing that upon such an occasion 
Kemble's penetration and discernment should ut- 
terly have abandoned him in adopting the absurd 
pronunciation of burd; for were we not borne 
out by the evidence, it would appear almost in- 
credible that he should fall into this ridiculous 
sj?ror, by adopting the sound hurd to the ©Id 



reading of heard, which was universally pro- 
nounced heerd. 

When Hudibras this language heard (heerd) 
He prick'd up 's ears and strok'd his heard. — Hud* 

Boy. Her mothers I have heard (heerd) 
Long. God's blessing on your beard. — Shaks, 

Things that the legend never heard of (heerd) 
But made the wicked sore afeard of.— Hud. 

Let others bear to sea — Mencetes heard, (heerd) 
But secret shelves too cautiously he fear'd 
And fearing sought the deep, and still aloft he 
steerd. — Dry. Yir. 

Of various tongues the mingled sounds were 

heard (heerd) 
Tn various garbs, promiscuous things appear'd. 

Pope. 

Oh wit and grave discretion I have heard (heerd 
Indeed do many times prevent a beard. 

Hoi. A. P. F. 

A thousand such examples might he pro- 
duced still further to confirm this blunder, but 
these are surely enough to put burd at rest 
with the Capulets for ever. Dr. Johnson was 



one of the last who retained heerd: he de- 
fended the pronunciation upon the principle 
of the sound hurd being the only deviation 
from that of ear; but neither the authority 
or practice of any individual should unfix the 
law established by the common decision of so- 
ciety. 

Thus Sir William Yonge would have had 

great so pronounced as to rhyme to seat, and if 
reason had possessed the power of controul, 
Sir William would have been submitted to ; but 

the public pronounced it urate, and retain to this 

day what Sir William donominated the erinism. 
In the old rhymes we find it invariably sounded 

greet : 

And as in prison mean rogues beat 

Hemp for the service of the great, (greet; Hud. 

Choose what thou would'st advise him, when the 

great (greet) 
Empress resolves to marry — This so neat Hol.J. 

Well ! what's the end ? O glory ! a defeat, 

He has ! flies into exile ! There this great (greet) 

However correct Kemble may have been 
with regard to the rhythmus, there was ape* 



PREFACE. Xlll 

dantry and affectation in his reading of aches 
which was inexcusable. Every body knew as 
well as he did what the metre required: every 
one knew, from innumerable positions, the old 
pronunciation of the word. It remained for 
him to break the stamp with which the public 
had impressed the term, and vainly to presume 
that he was communicating something* of which 
they were totally ignorant. Besides, in the fol- 
lowing passage, which is that in which he ren- 
dered himself so conspicuously ridiculous, the 
cesura impinges so strongly upon the word, 
and the hiatus created is so forcible, that it 
would have been far more creditable to his in- 
genuity to have accommodated it to the present 
reading, than it served his critical acumen by 
the new light he thought to shed upon liter- 
ature by so great a discovery. 

If thou neglect'st or dost unwillingly 
What I command, Til rack thee with old cramps, 
Fill all thy bones with aches: make thee roar 
That beasts shall tremble at thy din. 

Shah. Tempest a. 1, s. 2. 

Kind heav'n let heavy curses 
Gall his old age, cramps, aches, rack his bones. 
Otway'n Venice Pres* 



L 



XI* PREFACE. 

Can by their pangs and aches find 

All turns and changes of the wind H U (k 

As no man of his own self catches 
The itch or amorous French aches. 

Rome, corruptly pronounced Room by the 
players, is another of those unjustifiable devi- 
ations which the histrionic artist has generated, 
and to which it would appear (from the tena- 
city with which he adheres to it and opposes 
public opinion) he appends classical impor- 
tance — an importance similar to that of a vul- 
gar who intends to be vastly fine when he says 
"I were walking in the Park." Upon what 
principle do these people apologise for their 
Room} Not from the Greek or Latin, in 
botfi which they are sounded Roam, which 
would at once satisfy the conviction of any 
reasonable and educated person ; but from 
having found some old rhymes in which 
the word Rome is made to correspond with 
4omb and doom. 

He yet received the Cumbrians and the doom 
They threaten'd: he alone sav'd trembling Rome. 
(Room) Bol. Jup. 



Who thought not that the great born spirit- of 

Rome (Room) 
Had lyen o'erwhelm'd in her Brutus tomb. 

HoL A. P. F. 

First seiz'd the people's and frighted Rome (Room) 
Was fill'd with fatal prodigies; to whom ■ 

May's Lucan. 

But if such examples be produced to con- 
firm their correctness, a thousand might be 
brought forward to give it the sound of lltim, 
which it must be granted would be more 
spirited. 

Will I like Csesar to my country come, 

Nor never more unless with peace, shall Rome (Rum) 

When he his third dictatorship at Rome (Rum) 
Had tane and thence to Sicilie was come. 

Which from a kingdom's state is now bacome 
A subject province to imperial Rome (Rum) 

Then 'gainst thyself, if war so wicked, Rome (Rum) 
Then love, when all the world is overcome. 

Wouldst thou so wound our shame, that not from 

Rome (Rum) 
But Parthia the revenge of Roms (Rum) should come. 



Pompey but then a gentleman of Rome (Rum) 
Had quieted the West, and Spain overcome. 

It will be objected perhaps that in all these 
instances there is but the word come; but if 
the reader were to take the trouble of the ex- 
amination, he would find that to one instance of 
Rome rhyming with any other word, such as 
doom, tomb, whom, some, there are an hun- 
dred to the word come, and had Kemble adopted 
Rum as the proper sound instead of Room the 
innumerable authorities of jingling to substan- 
tiate it would have carried the propriety of the 
pronunciation beyond doubt and question, and 
placed it out of the reach of all controversy. 
Here again then the gentlemen of the stage 
have sadly blundered ; but as they are gene- 
rally too Boeotian for confutation, 1 he mistake 
is likely to obtrude itself still longer ; where 
there is little education and reason, there exist 
generally a superstitious attachment to error 
and an invincible repugnance to conviction. 

The following instances must be allowed 
some weight in establishing the English pro- 
nunciation of Rome, 
Winchester. — This Rome shall remedy. 
Warwick.— Then roam thither then,-— King Henri/ 6. 



PREFACE. XVII 

That their disordered silence here at home 
May any way disturb the peace of Rome. 

May's Lucan 76. 

His troops through France dispers'd strait calling home 
With flying colours marches on to Rome.^i£. 

Thus when we view some well proportioned dome 
The world's just wonder, and e'en thine, O Rome. 

Pope. E. on C. 

London, the needy villain's general home 
The common sewer of Paris and of Rome. 

Dr. Johnson. 

The following letter which appeared in 
the "Times" of November 3rd. 1829, speaks 
Ihe sense of the Public upon the question : 

{i Mr. Young's Brutus was beautifully impres- 
sive, There is one point in the performance which 
deserves particular remark, but certainly not of a 
laudatory nature. We allude to the pronunciation 
of the word 'Rome.' Mr. Young, following the 
example of the late John Kemble, perseveres with 
obstinate pertinacity in pronouncing it as if it were 
spelled with a double O, Room ; while Cassius, An- 
thony, and the other dramatis personse, pronounce 
the word in the ordinary, and, as we think, in the 



proper manner, Rome. For consistency's sake 
these Roman citizens ought to be uniform in their 
pronunciation of the name of the place of which 
they are denizens. It appears to us that it savours 
a little of affectation when Mr. Young chooses to 
adopt a pronunciation at variance with that of the 
public at large, Following up the principle on 
which he denominates Rome ' Room,' Mr. Young, 
we suppose, would descant on the doom, (dome,) of 
ihe king's palace, or would ask a friend to walk 
hoom with him to dinner.'' 

Editor's Note, Nov. 4th. 182 9. — The whole case 
lies in a nutshell. . The custom of educated society 
is the rule of pronunciation: Mr. Young must be a 
silly person to contend against the general sense of 
repeated audiences. 

The fiat of the Editor of the Times we 
regard as completely conclusive, and decisive of 
Ihe question, and assuming-, for an instant, the 
tone of Dr. Johnson, we say, " enough, no 
more of it." 

As we however do not wish to be tyran- 
nical, we will furnish the Eonm-ans with an 
apology for their pronunciation, and leave them 
to make the best of it, In a Latin author we 
are informed that Rome was built upon the site 
of a village called Rurna Mamma, Now words 



are easily dissolvable into each other ; Thame 
and Isis give us Tamesis, Thames, and this 
effect may be discerned without difficulty in 
Ruma Mamma; for if we take the first part 
of Mamma with Ruma we shall have Ruma-ma, 
which by apocope may he appropriately abbre- 
viated into Ruma'. and if we take the last part 
mma it will produce exactly the same result. 
It may be seen then, with the twentieth part 
of an eye, that Ruma is in reality a contrac- 
tion of both.* 

Further, it is well known that the letter u 
was pronounced by the Latins like our double 
o 9 which would give the sound of Rooma, from 
which it may be fairly inferred, that that was 
its proper appellation, and when we take into 
consideration that the old tree mentioned by 
Tacitus was called Rumelia, and that there 
exists at this day a country bearing the same 
patronymic, it will confirm at once the pro- 

* Tn these transactions the Ottoman prince, by 
the Orientals and even by Timour is styled the 
Kaissar of Roum. — Gibbon 12, 20. 

His kingdom of Roum extended from the Hel- 
lespont to the confines of Syria.— Gibb. 2,57. 



priety of- Room, Thus we furnish an argument 
for the players which ^will augment their infor- 
mation without mitigating their obstinacy ; and 
it will also exhibit to them the origin of the 
word mamma, and will no doubt excite their 
wonder to find that Papa is still the head of 
Mamma , or Room. 

Another word to which our attention is 
inperatively called, from the absurd practice of 
reading- it most ridiculously with two sounds, 
is wind, (ventus Latin) Now we hold and lay 
it down as a rule as immutable as the laws of 
the Medes and Persians that no word, in the 
same sense, can have two ways of pronunci- 
ation ; therefore this one cannot in prose be 
ivind and in poetry wined. It is allowed on 
every hand to be inconsistent with all the prin- 
ciples of good taste to make the sounds of 
words accommodate themselves to the influ- 
ence of the rhyme; if this were once to be done 
we should abandon language to merited deri- 
sion, and poetry to the most puerile efforts of 
doggrel. 

Of his late wars and toil ; his fame and glory, 
His power and gifts, the strongest oratory. 



PREFACE, XXI 

Were we to make the two last syllables of 
the last line a trochee instead of a pyrrhie 
the effect would be truly ludicrous. We should 
have fame and glory rhyming with oar-a- 
toar-ry. Again, 

Of their long service let these soldiers all 
Triumph, though under any general. 

Who would recommend in this example the 
reading of gener-awl for the purpose of jing- 
ling it with the preceding line ? No one could 
be found to advocate such an absurdity. 

Those that inhabit that far western shore 
Vainly suppose that they alone, before 
The setting sun forsake this atmosphere 
Do view his face at nearer distance there 
Than other men, than other countries can, 
And that he falls into their ocean. 

The last word of these lines, ocean, must 
be read o-she-an, if made to sound with can: 
the incongruity is too manifest to need more to 
be said on the subject. We take it for granted 
therefore that the impropriety of rhyming 
words is on all sides admitted ; but, as we are 
desirous of bringing the thing home to those 



who may notwithstanding be inclined Still to 
adhere to their wined, we require them to resrd 
the following lines. 

Touch If a hart do lack a hind 

Let him seek out Rosalind, 

If a cat will after kind 

So be sure will Rosalind. 

They that reap must sheaf and bind, 

Then to cart with Rosalind. 

Sweetest nut but sourest rind, 

Such a nut is Rosalind. 

No person would think of rhyming Rosa- 
lind with the final sound of the preceding lines : 
it would therefore on all hands be read, and 
correctly read, as a dactyl. We now arrive at 
our point, — and we ask, who would venture to 
sound wind, wined, in the first of the following* 
couplet ? 

Ros. Her worth being mounted on the wind 
Through all the world bears Rosalind. 

Not only would the proper pronunciation 
of the word be entirely lost, but the versification 
utterly destroyed — two blunders in one breath. 
We trust we have said enough to eradicate this 






inelegant custom, and to induce those who have 
hitherto heen guilty of it to lay it aside, and to 
aid us in our humble efforts to establish some- 
thing like principle for our guidance. He 
that is in error cannot rightly justify himself 
but by forsaking it: what is more honorable 
or praiseworthy than a secession to truth and 
reason ? 

There is nothing more idle than an endeavour 
to extract from poetical authors authority for 
the proper orthoepy of words ; they seek har- 
mony from the most palpable discordances. The 
citations given in the course of this work, will 
suffice to show that the most opposite pronun- 
ciations may be proved from poetry: no quota- 
tion can thence be brought forward as confirma- 
tory of either propriety or impropriety ; besides, 
time past cannot be permitted to dictate to 
time present. — Pope, although denominat- 
ed the great jingler, deserves by no means the 
reputation he has obtained as a versifier : he 
certainly does not possess in that respect the 
merit of his model Dryden. — urn and mourn, 
improve and love, weak and take, hear and ear, 
return and mourn, scorned and burned, meat 
-and sweat, vain and man, return and unborn, ar© 



instances from Pope which more than suffice to 
show how vague and frivolous any reference to 
poetry must be for the purpose of decision. — 
Poets are in the habit of accomodating any word 
with another, provided it be within a thousand 
miles of their mark, without regard to pro- 
priety, to rhyme, to metre, or indeed anything 
but their own indolence and immediate con- 
venience. The custom of good society is there- 
fore tne only standard: the jus et norma 
loquendi. 

One material circumstance to which it is 
necessary to allude^ whence great disturbance 
accrues to that universality of sound in words 
that it would be so desirable to establish, is from 
certain teachers, who, adopting a fanciful neo- 
logy, introduce pronunciations created from 
their own notions of propriety and which no- 
tions have been grounded perhaps in Ireland, 
Scotland or Yorkshire and introduced to the 
metropolitans as proprieties of speech. We 
do not intend to quarrel with these gentlemen 
^f we criticise them ; their aim has been lauda- 
ble and if they have failed in a little, society 
is indebted to them for a great deal ; but it is 
very essential that the vulgarisms they have 



adopted and patronised should be impeded in 
their march, at the entrance of the country they 
have so improperly invaded. 

We seldom meet with a Scot, an Irishman, 
or an English rustic, that does not boast of the 
superior orthoepy and dialect t)f his native 
soil ; yet Boswell apologised for being- a Scotch- 
man and years after boasted of his improved 
pronunciation. Irishmen are almost imperti- 
nent in their appeal to you upon the subject, 
and there exists a joke that Curran once seeing 
a man with his mouth wide open, said he was 
catching the English accent. Entitled to the 
same privilege we claim regal dominion for 
the parlance of the metropolis, and totally 
denegate the capability of any man to de- 
cide upon the enunciation of the English lan- 
guage; unless he not only have been bred in 
London, but circulated also in good society. 

We subjoin a very few of the singularities 
recommended by a teacher of elocution : — 
Basket — bas-ket Cough — coff 

Castle — cas-ile Chaps — chops 

Crafty — craf-ty Wrath — r-olh 

; G 1 a s s _ „g i as , Fro th—fr-oiJi 



Grant— gr-rcnf 
Plant — pl-ant 
Waft— waf-t 
Sample — sam-pk 
Gape — garp 
Falcon— fawcon 
Behove— beehoove 
Galeon — galloon 
Haunt — harnt 
Daunt — darrit 
Covetous — covetus 
Sojourn — so-journ 
Squirrel — Squerril 

The following he would have pronounced as 
if the first letter were followed by y, as Kyar, 
Kyind. 



Broth— br-oth 
Fulsome—; ful (as hull) 
Combat — kumbut 
Wonted — wunted 
Syrup — surrup 
Bosom — boosum 
Clef— clif 

Laudan urn — loddenam 
Yes— Yis 
Gaunt — garnt 
Choir — quire 
Panegyric — panegeric 



Car 
Guard 
Duty 
Tutor 



Kind 

Sky 
New 
Tuesday 



Card 

Girl 

Tulip 



Guide 

Calf 

Dew 



The first words of the list are pronounced in 
the manner laid down, only by the most effemi- 
nate dandies : such a method of speech outrages 
every feeling of manliness and propriety: what if 
a Fribble should say to us, I put thecjpla^ with 



the glas into the bas-kct which was gr-anted me 
and carried it as a sam-ple to the cas-tlc. — We 
ask of every man if it would not disgust him to 
sickness ? The following belong- to the most 
wretched absurdities of the stage, and even 
there to the most low and uneducated. The 
dyuke made a nyeiv tyune upon the iyulip co- 
vered with dyew, and brought it to the tyutor 
onfyucsday. He was in the kyar with thegyuide 
whose dyuly it was to be kyind to the gyirl who 
had bought the kyalf. The others do not ap- 
pertain to the English language. 

This gentleman inculcates that, all words 
beginning with ivh, should be pronounced with 
the h first — thus — I saw a h-icale in the h-warf 
tied to a h-weel to be h-ivipped, h-ivich I 
thought h-wimsical. 

Another orthoepist of the day give us the 
fallowing illustrations of his system : — 



Again 


agen 


Cucumber 


cowcumber 


Against 


agenst 


Decorous 


de-kore-us 


Apostle 


apossel 


Drought 


drort 


Axiom 


axshum 


Dew 


dyew 


Beneatji 


beneathe 


Duke 


dyuke 


Buoy 


Wov 


Drama 


dravma 



XXV1U PRE 

Chaldron chavvdron 
Cochineal kutshineel 
Combat kumbat 

Combatant kumbatant 
Corn korrn not kawn 
Cough kofnotkorf 
Cross kross not krawse 



Disoblige disobleej 
Educate edjucate 

Environs s. environs 
Extraordinary extrordinary 



Fabric 

Gold 

Heinous 

Important im-pore-tant Chorister 

Knowledge no-ledge 



Lest 
Leisure 
Luxury 
New 

Oblique 

Patent 

Patron 

Progress 

Prologue 

Pumice 



leest 
leezyur 
lukshury 
nyew 
oblike 
pay tent 
paytron 
prog-ress 
prol-og 
pu-mis 



Rarity 
Rather 
Saturn 
Satire 
Source 



faybric 
go old 
haynous 
quirrister 
rar-ity 
raythur 
sa-turu 
sa-tur 



Suggest sug-jest not sudjest 
Sovereign suvverin not sorren 
Wont wunt 

Wrath rarth 

Zenith zee-nith not zen-ith 



Pronunciation pro-nunsh-she-ation 



Had pome (poem) and windy (window) 
been added to the above list, we should have 
been confirmed in our supposition that the gen- 
tleman belonged to that emerald isle 



• great glorious and free 



First flower of the earth and first gem of the sea. 

It is not necessary to say one word upon them : 
to notice them is quite sufficient. 

In agriculture it is of consequence to era- 
dicate weeds from the soil : in conversation it is 
equally important to expel the barbarisms of 
vulgarity ; and if language be not enriched 
and decorated by the eruncation, the face of it 
is rendered more agreeable and the whole body 
put in such a state of improvement as to encou- 
rage our hopes of its producing at a future 
period a reward for our labours. He who inter- 
lards his language with a low and vicious 
phraseology is like a man who picks up withered 
leaves when he might gather flowers: the place 
in which he inserts a nettle he might have sup- 
plied with a rose. Is it preferable to say "I 
was very lorth to do it " or " I did it with much 
reluctance ?'' 6i He did it for me like a 
new un " or " he did it without the least hesi- 
tation ?" The habit of speaking ill is like the 
habit of doing ill: it increases by iudulgence; 
and if not repressed, excludes from usage a se- 
lection of words that would place conversation 
in a more respectable position, and bestow upon 



L 



it more solidity and brilliancy. The tongue is 
the percolator of the pen : what the former prac- 
tices be it good or bad, falls most readily and 
habitually from the latter. It should therefore 
be trained up with the most severe discipline, 
and the most rigid care observed in selecting 
a choice of words which may familiarize it to 
an elegant diction, and a prompt and energetic 
utterance. Not only must this recommendation 
be rigorously attended to, but the utmost efforts 
exerted to avoid the mispronunciation of words; 
and detect those corruptions which so com- 
monly glide into- the speech of the best of us. — 
One would imagine that the march of intellect 
by this time would have effected something for 
us in this matter ; but this march of intellect 
learning is very like a pot of honey of which the 
possessor to gratify our longing permits us to lick 
the outside; of the reality, whether in substance 
savour or colour we remain in perfect ignor- 
ance. Except in the professionally classical 
schools there is no education in England i it is 
for the mass of the people, the worst educated 
country in Europe. The seminaries are occu- 
pied by any sort of men, over whom the magis- 
trate has no controul, and to meet an educated 



person among the march of intellect people 
would be a miracle as great as the absurdity 
that could anticipate it. Thus an indesinently 
flowing ignorance perpetuates all sorts of cor- 
ruptions ; and, until every school be turned into 
a college by means of properly qualified masters, 
we are hopeless of amelioration. Fas est ab hoste 
doceri.. Can we not stoop to imitate the institu- 
tions of the Continent? or is there still a lin- 
gering fear of education? 

In matters of orthoepy we have not alone 
to resist the efforts of a wretched system of in- 
struction, but have to contend against system- 
mongers and rackers of prosody out of number : 
men who seem to have had Holofernes for their 
schoolmaster. 

Hol. He draweth out the thread of his verbo- 
sity finer than the staple of his argument. I 
abhor such fantastical phantasms, such unsociable 
and point devize companions ; such rackers of or- 
thography as to speak dout fine, when he should say 
doubt; det when he should say debt, d-e-b-t, not 
d-e-t; he clepeth a calf, caulf; half, hauf; neigh- 
bour vocatur nebour ; neigh abreviated ne. It insi- 
nuateth me of insanie.- L.L.L. a. 5, s. 1. 



Were we to follow these point devise com- 
panions in their caprices, we might upon the 
principle of former usage justify an alteration of 
very many words such as importune, chaws, 
heard j lucre!, great, greet, wrack, afeared, 
drowth, aspect, aches, contract, perse ver, se- 
pulchre, compact, advertise, rheumatic, and a 
hundred others to be found in the body of the 
work. We raise our voice against these 
everlasting mutations; and against the im- 
pertinence, for the most part based on the 
grossest vulgarity, of these daring- innova- 
tors. Custom alone is the arbiter, and with- 
out regard to systems, dictionary makers, teach- 
ers of elocution, or lustrums, we pronounce re-* 
fined and educated society, the sole criterion of 
that which is most generally approved and 
spoken. To attempt the disturbance of a lan- 
guage by finical coxcomry; or by patois, which 
has as much relation with metropolitan lan- 
guage as it has with the Sclavonic, is not only 
ridiculous but injurious; inasmuch as it is 
subversive of conformity, deranges the deter- 
minations of good society, and impedes that 
which it would Le so desirable to obtain, a 
fixity of pronunciation. 






About 1550 the Royal Professors of Paris 
began to correct some abuses which vitiated 
the pronunciation of the Latin. Many ecclesi- 
astics warmly patronised the war against the 
barbarisms complained of, in spite of the Sor- 
bonnists, who favoured the corruptions ; and 
who carried matters, in so trivial a case, even 
to deprive an incumbent of his benefice for 
pronouncing quisquis, quamquam, according to 
the reformed method, and not kiskis. kam- 
kam,* the old way. The incumbent appealed 
to the Parliament ; and the Royal Professors, 
fearing 1 lest he should be overcome by the 
great influence of the Doctors of the Sarbonne, 
required an audience of the king, in which 
they represented with such energy the folly 
and indignity of the college, that all men were 
left afterwards to pronounce Latin as they 
liked best. We might, upon similar grounds, 
conjure up a war upon conquer and conquest, 

* Evans. Shew me William, some declensions of your 
pronouns. 
William. Forsooth I have forgot. 
Evans, It is ki. ke, kod; if you forget your kies, 
your kee>, and your kods, you mnst he 
preeches. — M. IV, o/ IV. a. 4, $. I. 



XXXIV PREFACE. 

which in consistency we should pronounce 
alike, but neither reason nor consistency can 
interpose in the affair — under an acknowledged 
despot it is folly to complain of want of law. 

The uselessness of meddling with anomalies 
diffused over the whole face of a language, is 
rendered still more striking- and lamentable, by 
a reference to the outrages latterly com- 
mitted upon the Spanish by the system mon- 
gers of that nation. Here is perhaps the 
finest language of Europe deteriorated by ca- 
price and fatuity, only to give occasion at a 
future time, for the properly thinking and eru- 
dite to restore its Latinity. Time tardily 
begets changes in many words, but it is tar- 
d'ly, and we submit so leisurely to the alter- 
ation that it is scarcely apparent. 

Multa renascentur qua? jam cecidere; cadentque 
Quae nunc sunt in honore vocabula, si volet usus; 
Quern penes arbitrium est, et jus et norma loquendi. 

Horace. 

" Many words shall be revived which had become 
obsolete ; end many now in use shall cease to 'e written 
if custom sha 1 so will it, in the power of which, is the 
deter mi aatfoir, the law, and criterion of language. 






Since the reign of Queen Anne the En- 
glish has undergone but little change in its or- 
thography, and if the public determine that 
the word custom in the above quotation shall 
not be expunged for the sole purpose of substi- 
tuting- literary quackery, it will undergo in future 
as little in orthoepy ; there never was yet a 
face or a picture without a deterioration ; but 
if we endeavour violently to remove a freckle 
or are constantly patching an imperfection, the 
defect we intend to remedy will be rendered 
far more conspicuous, and destruction instead 
of conservation will be the result. 

Before we conclude we must refer to a 
matter which occasions abundance of dispute 
on the part of the provincials, and that is tb,e 
nonaspiration of the letter 11 by the metropo- 
litans. That letter is acknowledged to be the 
most useless of the alphabet, and almost the 
only one requiring a guttural effort to pro- 
nounce. The Saxons, in whose lauguage the 
gutteral sounds prevail, consider them so in- 
harmonious as to sink as much as possible the 
anti-euphonic sy] sables. The Tuscans, the ele- 
gance of whose Italian is on all hands ad- 



mitted, corrupt their dialect by a guttural enun- 
ciation, of which the Roman is altogether des- 
titute. The altisonant Spanish is injured by a 
similar depravation, which is preclusive of that 
sweetness so desirable in language, and which 
is so admirable in the bocca Romana. If the 
Metropolitans drop a sound so inimical to that 
softness which constitutes a peculiar beauty in 
speech, they are justified in so doing upon all 
the piinciples of good taste: they reject a 
harshness to adopt an excellence. A native of 
London would make no difference in the sound, 
were he to say "she is artless," or "she is 
heartless," fully persuaded that the context 
and spirit of the discourse would exhibit the 
sense without the possibility of perversion or 
the chance of misunderstanding. 

But the Provincials, accustomed to a 
harsh determination of the voice regard this 
nonaspi ration as the most unvenial of sins. 
Habituated to the halloo of the chase, to speak 
against the roaring of the wind, to call from 
hill to hill, to vociferate in the forests, they ac- 
quire a peculiarity of intonation by which they 
are instantly recognised ; and, if they obta*m 



PREFACE. XXXV11 

an easiness of guttural enunciation, they roust 
admit that the pre-eminence thus exclusively 
possessed is not unaccompanied with disadvan- 
tage, for like Midas who, when he had ob- 
tained the favour of the God, was compelled 
to tuin every thing he touched into gold, so 
the rustics attach their rough breathing indis- 
criminately to every letter capable of receiving 
it. We thus hear of H-India, h-orthography, 
h-ell-wide,h-ebony, h-instinct, h-oxen, lacerat- 
ing at the same time their own larynx and afflict- 
ing the more delicate tympana of their metro- 
politan auditors by a cacophanous pseudology 
as ridiculous as it is falsely imagined to be 
proper. It would be quite as reasonable to 
follow them in their universal application of 
the word ©<?, the use of which is a syntactical 
canon in rural grammar, as in their sound of 
the eighth letter. The indefinite article an 
was formerly written before any word begin- 
ning with k : latterly grammarians have deter- 
mined otherwise, and permit its use only with 
vowels and words to which they will not allow 
the aspirate. In a matter of such high import 
the public must judge for themselves: in the 



XXXVU1 PREFACE. 

hope of their approbation we have given read- 
ing's of words, beginning with h, where an 
may be permitted to precede ; but we cannot 
help opining with former authors that the less 
the letter in question is regarded, the greater 
will be the mellifluence and the greater the eu- 
phony. 

In endeavouring to point out and remove 
some of the blemishes by which our language- 
is disfigured, it will probably be asked upon 
what authority we dictate; to which we reply, 
it is not we who dictate, but the custom of good 
society. Some will say they never should com- 
mit a particular impropriety: to which we 
subjoin, so much the better; but many • do. 
Others will remark that some of the expres- 
sions appertain to the less instructed classes of 
society — we reply that for them, more particu- 
larly, was this work prepared. But, there is 
one thing we will venture to assert, from the 
negligence we know almost universally to per- 
vade, there are fevf who will not recognise 
themselves in the book. 



For the information of those who have not 
studied the Latin or Greeks and are conse- 
quently unversed in scanning or measuring syl- 
lables, we beg to point out that long syllables 
or such as the emphasis falls upon are marked 
thus — : short syllables are designated by a 
curved line, thus w . For example, the word 
barter has the emphasis upon the first syllable; 
and, to shew its pronunciation, would be thus 
marked, barter, which two marks form what 
is termed a trochee. The word benumb has 
the accent on the latter syllable, and is marked 
the contrary way, which is termed an iambus. 
Similar marks are made use of in the work to 
determine where the stress of the voice should 
fall ; besides which the author has endeavoured, 
by a paronomous or similarly sounding word 
to facilitate and render evident the true pro- 
nunciation. 



The reader is requested to notice that in referring 
to the Index the proper word must be looked for. 



ERRATA. 

Pref. p. 15. people's — people 

frighted—affrighted 
19. For the passage as it stands, read — the old 
tree mentioned by Tacitus was called 
Ruminalis, and that there exists at this 
day a country bearing' the patronymic 
Rumelia. 
33. conquer— conqueror 
35. gutteral— guttural 
Page 4. mominative— nominative 
7. waa— was 
il. to much — too 

16. matters— matter's 

17. karlekin— harlekin 
IS. ths— the 

50. tedium — tedium 



VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



Fetch the hyntment 
He is gone to townd 
The mercantile world 
A glass of wyned 
By the showlders 
A regular vagrum 
It isn't your consarn 
Does the water bile ? 



ointment oyntment 
town jjj 

mercantile 
wine 
shoulders sholeders 
vagrant 
concern 
boil - boyl 

But let a fever rich Gallita boile 
Or childless Paccius, straight the temple's ile 

H.J.s. 12. 



She is so pervarse 
The water's loowann 
What an effluvia 
That's super-flew-ous 1 
The pudding's burnt to 
Empt that basin 
Heft that weight 
That's bold almanack 
I had it free gratis 



perverse pervurse 

lukewarm 

effluvium 

superfluous 

burnt to the pot 

empty 

lift, raise 

bole ammoniac 

omit free 



VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



Cowcumbers and indive 

The laying in hospital 

Bring a sallitt 

At White Cundik House 

Pray, take a cheer 

Common Garden 

What a pretty creetur 

It's the natur of it 

Three fardens 

Give two haypence 

I ax'd him about it 

Buy some pennywinkles 

I took the oltitude 

They strained for the rent 

He has a spice of his father 

The naytional school 
You are preemature 
I"m subject to the boil 
Bring me a cutlash 
An excellent meddysun 
A horrid massacree 
The nommynative case 
The tschyle of the stomach 

A harnch of vcnnvsun 



cucumbers and endive 
lying in 
salad 
Conduit Cundit 

chair 
Covent 
creature kreetshur 
nature naytshur 

farthings 
halfpence 
asked arsk*d 

perriwinkles 
altitude 
dis-trained 
something of the cha- 
racter 
national nashunal 

premature prem-atshur 
bile 
cutlass 
medicine medsun 

massacre masserker 
mominative nomnative 
chyle kyle 

S haunch hawnch 

c venison vensun 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 5 

It's a rale diermunt diamond, real dymund 

Full of ter-giv-ersation ter-jiversation 

She can'f come while evening until the evening 
She is the mattron matron maytron 

He is the paytron patron pat-tron 

What a whyld he's gone while 

He's a formidable fellow formidable 

I was obligated obliged 

They have no industry Industry 

Not strolling idleness to aid, 
But honest industry decay'd. — Swift's Mis. 

St. Se-pull-ker's church sepulcre* sepulkur 

To take my spoils and leave my body bare 
As for my sepulchre-let heaven take care. 

Dry.JEn.b. 2,i\ 877. 
Or secret sands shall sepulchres afford 
To thy proud vessels and their perjur'd lord. 

Dry.JEn. 6.4, v. 553. 
Silv. Go to thy lady's grave and call her thence ; 

Or at the least in her's sepulchre thine.-=-2 G. of V- 

He lives in Singin street St. John-street 

Awake my St. John (Sinjin) leave all meaner things. 
Pope's Ess. on Man, /. 1 . 
Of the typus fever typhus tyfus 

I"ve got tbe opthalmy ophthalmia ofthalmia 

* The verb is supulchre; but the noun is sepulchre. 



6 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

He is very fillantroffick philanthropic fillan- 

thropic 
In our ridgiinent regiment ridgment 

The thehayter's burnt theatre 

From thence return, attended with ray train, 
Where the proud theatres disclose the scene. 

Geor. 3. 

It's quite lamentable lam-entable 

Here's towards your health towards toeherds 

Lor. And sigh'd his soul toward the Grecian tents. 

M.o/V.aA.s.X. 
Hurling defiance toward the vault of heaven. 

P. L.b.l, 1669. 

Near Redriff ' \ Rotherhithe 

The horse was rusty restive 

I don't like cereraSny ceremony 

I fotched it myself fetched 

Not for the warsal world universal 

have cast the 'versal worlds nativity H. 

Vot are they made of what 

Vy, vith vax, vicks, and all why, with wax, wicks 

and all 
Vot a pain in my lines what, loins 

Whose pitch more vessels keeps? more lasting wines? 
What wert to help then, a spent clients loins, [lines] 

H.J.s.9. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 7 

A buggumy pitch plaster Burgundy 

Hotter of roses otto 

He took me by the scruff of 1 « , , 

the neck } A sheer vul S a ™ m 

A hayporth of apples half penny worth 

Give me a haypenny half penny 

He's a capital bouler bowler boler 

It's q u»e elated { jggEgj 

In rayal harnest real, earnest, ernest 

He belongs to the quire choir koy-er 

Let all the quire of clowns attend the show 
In long procession, shouting as they g-o. 

Dry. G. I. 473. 
The commonality of people common-alty 

The rule of substraction sub-traction 

He received a chastisement chastisement 

It's a good sperrit spirit spirrit 

When I was in Hinjey India Indier 

The star was on the orrizon horizon ho-ri-zon 

They bought a shay cart a chaise cart 

How gashly he looks ghastly garstly 

rpi , • , ,, f design* subtle 

The dezign waa sub-tie j desJ | n ^ 

He sells karrun carion . kar-ri-un 

* The adjective and participle dezigned. 



8 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

It took such a holt of him a hold of him 

The horse raired up reared reer'd 

We had turtle and csetera turtle et csetera 

I have never a one I have none 

As pretty as a cherubin cherub 

Gadsbud ! she's a wife for a cherubin. — D. D. a. 2. 
I doubted its a-curacy accuracy 

It was very acseptable acceptable 

■ let us then not pursue 
By force impossible, by leave obtain'd 
Unacceptable, though in heaven. 

^.£.6.10,0.259. 
He was an accessory accessory 

he would have spoke 

But hiss for hiss return'd with forked tongue 
To forked tongue, for now were all transformM 
Alike, to serpents all as accessories. 

P. L. b. 10, v. 520. 
The law takes cog-nizance cognizance connizance 
Not conversant in the law cdnversant 

Enquire at the Admiraltry Admiral-ty 

The curd is made withrunnitt rennet 

I went to Guy-ldhall Guildhall Ghildhall 

He practyzes his exercise practises 

They received a respite respite respi'fc 

Skum the pot skim 

Give me the ribbin riband rib-band 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE 9 

The pynt of the knyfe point poynt 

Gone on an harrand er-rand 

Goe soul the bodies guest 

Upon a thanklesse arrant. 

Rehof A.P.thetye. 
Hnce I will yes 

Is that saykrilige? sacrilege sak-ri-lidge 

I hate so-fistry sophistry sof-istry 

He dislikes saytur satire sat-tyre 

Satyr is a sort of glass wherein beholders do generally 
discover every body's face but their own. 

Swift B. of B. 

That's my highdee of it idea eye-dear 

At first there was a tchaos chaos kayus 

It fell down the hairy area aie-re-ur 

Have you got any bakky tobacco 

We went to the larnch launch lawnch 



- Then from his ear 



He poiz'd and aim'd, and launch'd the trembling spear. 

Dry.jEn.b.9. 

Put it in an invellup envelope envelope 

Envelope that in cotton envelope en-vel-liip 

Lend these to paper sparing Pope, 
And when he sits to write 

No letter with an envelope 

Could give him more delight. Swift's Mis. 



10 



VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



I haiat got narer a pia 
It's agin the- table 
Shet the shetters 
It was so appeal antly 
Where are my gallowses 
I shuperintended it all 
Fetch some kurrans 
He clomb up the tree 



I have not a pin 

against 

shut the shutters 

apparently apparently 

braces 

su-perintended (soo) 

currants 

climbed 



Swift as the winds or Scythian arrows fight, 
He clomb with eager haste th'aerial height. 

D.M. 6.8,1;. 293. 
In at the window climbs, or o'er the tiles, 
So clomb this first grand thief into God's fold. 

P.L. b. 4, v. 192, 



She sot upon his knee 
The body was anotomized 
He's kotched at last 
That's her lovyer 
He had a proper basting 
I was a right to do it 
It's very ludickerous 
She boffled you there 
He bust the door open 



sat 

a-nat-omized 

caught 

lover love-her 

beating 

I had 

ludi-crous krus 

baffled 
burst berst 



Of a very warm temperament* temper, meaning 
passionate 

emper relates to mind— temperament to body. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 11 

That's very ill convenient in -convenient 

Look in the kinnel kennei 

I did it the fift time fif-th 

Thus said wise Ennius aftVh'bad dream'd he was 
Homer the fift formed by Pythagoras. 

Uolyday.A.P.F. 
" That it may not he defended to say that Pythagoras 
was before Homer and so to say that 'Ennuis was the 
fift from Pythagoras."— Holy day. 

I was laying down lying" 

Barkshire and Darby Berk-shire Der-b}' 

I harrd it yesterday heard herd 

Mr. Smith, Esquire Thomas Smith, Esq. 

Take this here and that there this and that 
Only on work-a-days working days 

Jest so just 

Give me the scithers scissors sizzefs 

Will you boul? bowl bole 

Marg. Come, come, you talk greasily : your lips grow foul 
Cost. She's too bard for you at pricks Sir, challenge her 

to bowl 
Boy. I fear to much rubbing— good night my good owl. 
Lovs^s Lab. Lost, a. 4, s. 1. 

'He was wownded wounded woonded 

1 was a great mind I had 

With the greatest of pleasure omit of 

The whold biling was spylt whole, boiling, spoiled 



12 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



How you garp gape 

Of horses led, and grooms besmeared with g'old, 



Dazzles the croud, and sets them all agape. 

P. I. 5, 129, 

> Jan-u-ary, Feb-ru-ary 

poached 

said he, said I 

chasm kazm 

churl tchurl 

slippery 

catch 



In Jennerwerry andFeber 
werry 

Some porched eggs 

J usfr so says he, so says 1 

What a tchazm 

He's a proper old kurl 

The streets are slippy 

Ketch it, Ann, ketch it 



We were c5mmenting upon it commenting 

Second Lord. We did my Lord, weeping and comment- 
ing upon the sobbing deer. 

As you like it, a. 2, s. 1. 

player, or actor 

iiiy grammar 

once wunse 

coral korral 

charta karta 

threw 



He's a play-actor 
My grammar book 
I was wunst there 
This necklace is kurral 
According to Magna Charta 
He heaved it at me 

Pros. By foul play as thou say'st were we heaved thence. 
Steph. I escaped upon a butt of sack which the sailors 

heaved overboard. — Temp. 
se is a dipthong diph-thong dif- 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



13 



eau is a tripthong 

She's a nold dooman 

I prefer chest to whisk 

He gave me a serpeeny 

Make a kurtchy, miss 

He behaves respectably to his 

parents 
He sot on the bench astroddle 
It's hardly creditable 
For five days successfully 
She's too decissive by far 
flangkore, hangkore 
I harnselled his shop 



triph-thong trif- 

an old woman 

chess whist 

subpoena subpener 

courtesy k artsy 

respectfully 

sat, a-straddle 

credible 

successively 

decisive de-sigh-si ve 

encore ornkore 

hanselled 



Lend me your hingeyrubber India-rubber Indi-er 
The act of habis korpis habeas corpus 

The harnted house haunted horn-ted 

"Now you shall see some grandames or fond aunts, 
Whom women's fury, superstition haunts. 

Hoi. A.P.P.s. 2. 



The title is herrydittary 
Don't be so fantarstical 
That distitch is pretty 
A substarntial dinner 
I bought his demez^y 
What hyperbowl 



hereditary he-red-itary 

fan_-tas-ti-cal 
distich distik 

sub-stan-tial 
demesne demean 

hyperbole hlghperboliy 



14 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



Quite a merrykle 

Do you learn drawring 

Get up the lather 

This is stick Kkerish 

He's a Uropean 

The Pytha-gore-ean system 

Beware of his matchinations machinations 

I took a drort of beer draught 

Poor Secundus Carinas, Athens taught; 

Which ne'er durst give, save a cold hemlock drarght 

Hoi. Juv.s.l. 
Greatness with Timdn lives in such a di aught, 
As hrings all Brobdignag before your thought. 

Pofe. 



miracle mirrarkel 

drawing 

ladder 

liquorice 

an Euro-pean 

Pythago-re-an 

mak- 
drarft 



With great con-tu-macy 
The prophet Mahomet 
It's a great curosity 
Bring the grediron 
It's very mountaneous 
He was necessiated 
In the tobacco line 
Its quite unpossible 
ByrOn wrote at Aithens 
Leastwise it may be so 
He's a city marchant 
A great conquest of people 



con-tumacy 

Mahomet 

curiosity ku-re-os-sity 

grid-iron 

mountainous 

necessitated 

trade 



Athens Ath-ens 

at least 

merchant mur-chent 

concourse 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE* 



15 



We went in a shay chaise 

She's gone for good not to return 

A muslin gownd gown 

Give it me or else I'll tell omit else 

I saw rim I saw him 

We took away the petition par-tition 

He is a batcheldor bachelor 

They dezarvcd it well deserved de-zurved 
She is so obstropalous obstreperous 

She drives a pheaton phaeton fa-e-ton 

That's the whole tote of it omit tote* 

That argufies nothing argues 

All pale and wan (an) wan* whon 

Sejanus dragg'd ! O joy ! his lips, his wan 
Face saw y' ? Believe't I never lov'd the man. 

H. J. s. 10. 
Whose helm confess'd the lineage of the wan, 
And bore with wings display'd a silver swan. 

D.JEn,. 10, v. 270. 



The chimley smokes 
I had rayther not 
Quite a projidy 
Where's my ankicher 
Tut on the kivver 
The Implements of trade 



chimney 
rather rar-ther 

prodigy 

hand-ker-chief 

cover kuver 

implement impleement 



* A valgar pleona&m from totus, all, Latin. 



16 



VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



Clean that sarsspan 

That was no more norl 
manners 

How the cat miyows 

Don't be sarcy 

I like apple sarse 

Have you seen the chaney 

Give me a sarser 

In the gulf of Veenis 

Put an apostruf 

He didn't venter there 

Where is my darter? 

He lives contagious to me 

She's afeard 



saucepan sawse-pan 
more than 



: 



myuze 
saw-cy 
savvce 



mews 
saucy 
sauce 

china 
saucer 
Venice 
apostrophe apostrofee 
venture ventshur 

daughter dawter 

contiguous 

afraid 



saw ser 

Ven-is 



What thickest of Jove? think'st be may be preferred: 
Fore some? whom? be't ev'h Staiusj art afear'd ? 

Hol.A.P.F.s.2. 
Did not that tempest strike? they're worse afraid 
Of the next then, as but today delay'd. 

Hoi. Juv. 
Trtsc. - I afeard of him ? 

Cal. A i t tb ou afeard ? 

Be not afeard, the isle is full of noises. — Temp. 

He wont for fraid of the law from fear 

He did it like a new un without hesitation 

He is too peert by half pert purt 

The matters duberous dubious 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



17 



Its quite dubersum 
The house is contidjus 
How the meat has plimmed 
He's a musicianer 
He received a wownd 
Who are hyperboreans ? 
, 1 like suetty pudding- 
He's a physiciancr 
How his chops water 



doubtful 

contiguous 

plumped up 

musician 

wound woond 

hyperboreans 

suet 

phy sician fesician 

chaps 



Their whelps at home expect the promis'd food, 
And long to temper their dry chaps in blood. 

Dry. Mn> I. 2, I. 4S3. 
I like hallicumpam elecampane 

He thorts me in every thing thwarts th-warts 

What a scrowdgeing crowding 

He cherrupped to the birds chirped 

They inveigled me into it inveigled in-va-gled 
Don't squeedge so squeeze 

It's the portent of ill portent 

Vers'd in portents, experienced and inspir'd 
To tell events and what the fates requir'd. 

JSn.b, 924. 
The fearful priests who feign those entrails show 
Portent of dire calamity and woe. — Luc. b. 7. 

He's a famous karlekin harlequin 

Born at Brummagem Birmingham 



IS VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



marsh-mallows 
I have 

venom 



legate 
masculine 



Made of mashmallows 

I'm just done 

She is always spitting her £ 
vemon $ 

That's a specimen t of.it 

An excellent sarment 

The cardinal was lee-gat 

The marsculyne gender 

She's gone to sarvice 

The meermaid tavern 

I'm lorth to move 

You are a reglar warment 

Do hayther 

At an opportune moment 

Consider'*! every creature which of ail 
Most opportune might serve his wiles. 

P.L.b.9, 
Fred. ■■ the murkiest den 

The most opportune place.. — Temp. a. 3, 



specimen 
sermon 

leg-at 

mas-cu-lin 

service sur-vis 

mermaid mur-made 

loath • lothe 

a regular varmint 

either ee-ther 

opportune 



.2. 



Give me the t'other 
A palaretick stroke 
That's sturrupatriped 
I wont bate a penny. 
Mind ths postes- 
A very leetel bit 
Dyed with skotshineel 



the other 

para-lytic 

ste-re-o-typed 

abate 

posts 

little 

cochineal kotshineei 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 19 

done to a sitiation situation sittu-a-shon 

I can eat any think thing 

Have you been in Portingal Por-tu-gal 

Now by the roode, three years and more 
I have been admirall over the sea, 
And never an English nor Portingall 
Without my leave can passe this way.. 

Rel. of An. Poetry. 
She's off somewheres somewhere 

We didn't mislest you - molest 

Dick's no schollard scholar skoller 

Quite the contrary contrary 

If they thy soldiers or companions be, 
Great Ponrpey sigh'd to see how contrary 

Luc. P. May. 
So contraries on Etna's top conspire. — Cowley. 
Hub. I saw a smith stand with his hammer thus, 
Thcwhilst his iron did on the anvil cool, 
With open mouth swallowing a tailor's news, 
Who with his shears and measure in his hand,- 
Standing on slippers, which his nimble haste 
Had falsely thrust upon contrary feet. 

K.J.a.4,s.%. 
Pros. A falsehood in its contiary" as great. — Tempest. 
1st Cap. You must contrary me.— Rom. fy J.a.l,s. 2. 
Gon. Fthe commonwealth I would by contraries execute 
all things. 



20 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



I hate lemon-tations 
Ghostes is nonsense 
In many pynts, you're right 
He is so blasphemious 
Howsomdever I can say this 
I've no call to do it 
On no account whatsomever 
They gave me an item of it 
He shyed a stone at me 
I went to Craydon Fair 
In the margent of the page 
Do you like sallery 
Pickled hinguns 
You're quite puirial 
A pickled gohard 
I was quite nonplushed 
He is a properriote.r 
She is always colloguing 
He's quite an ottomy 
I saw the paragraft 
He did it effecshally 
Thoroughly ruinated 
It is so sollentary 
Throw away the refuge 
I was very tosticated 



lam-entations 



points poy-ntz 

blasphemous blasfemus 

however 

occasion 

whatever 

a hint 

threw 

Croydon Croy-don 

margin 
celery sellery 

onions unyuns 

puer-ile 
gourd gurd 



pro-pri-etor 

col-leaguing 

an anatomy 

paragraph paragrarf 

ef-fec-tu-al-ly 

ruined 

sol-it-ary 

refuse ref-yuse 

in-tox-i-cated 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



21 



Bring up the taters potatoes purtaytuz 

Pray set down sit 

The aspect* of the house aspect 

Yon house erected on the rising ground 
With tempting aspect drew me from the road. 

Beg. Pet. 
The verdant walks their charming aspect lose, 
And shrivell'd fruit drops from the withe r'd boughs 
Blackmore. 
Tears in his eyes distraction in *s aspect.— Hand. 



He's very humursom . 
She was ticed away 
I cant take a refushal 
Did he indeed ? railly 
The review is postponded' 
The doom of the church 
He rizz about five 
A consort. of music - 
Not far from Lunnun 
I r aired it myself 
A matter of fifty 
He hollowed out so 
That's not hizn, its hern 



humourous 

enticed 

refusal refusle 

real-ly 

post-poned 

dome doam 

rose 

con-cert 

London Lundun 

reared reerd, 

about 

hallooed 

his, hers 



* Shakespeare, Milton, Dryden, &c give the pro- 
nunciation invariably of aspect to this word: i't is but of 
late that it has assumed a differenj orthoepy. 



£2 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

She lit the candle lighted 

Give him the remainer remain-der 

Its ourn, yourn, theirn ours, your.*, theirs 

What beautiful laylock li-lac 

If so be as how you knows it if you know it 

Where's the sparrowgrass as-para-gus 

In pershoot of that pursuit per-soot 

I was spilt twice thrown (from a horse*) 

The perushal of the letter perusal perusle 

She's in her widow-wood widowhood 

It was a pre-sage of evil presage pressidge 

Oh dire presage! But fear thou not my friend, 
Our steps theguardians of the just attend. 

S tiv age Wand. 
Who follow'd then his father to the war, 
A good presage the augurs all declare. 

May*s Luc.br6. 
If my afflictions bear a sad presage, 
On me fair princess, every evil fall.— Timanthcs. 

Slack not the good presage, while heav'n in spires 
Onr mindi to dare and gives the ready fires. 

B.JE. 5,883. 
How howdacious audacious or-da-shus 

He's underminded me under-mined 

I sartenly think so certainly sir-ten-ly 

* A g*ross vulgarism. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



23 



It sets my teeth all of a hedge on edge 


He's an obelisk to all of us 


obstacle 


I chucked it at him 


threw 


She skrunched it between 
her teeth 


J- crushed 


He tied my wristes 


wrists 


A plebean dog" 


plebeian ple-be-an 


That lace was smugd 


smuggled 


Looky, looky 


look you 


They druv me away 


drove 


A shameful plaggerist 


plagiarist pladg-er-ist 


A decent liveliwood 


liveli-hooct 


Two dozen hoyshters 


oysters hoy-sters 


Versed in literatoor 


literature littera-tshur 


He's a biackyinoor 


blackmoor 


The King was nyneted 


anointed 


It was notoarous 


noto-ri-ous 


Performed kwarrantyne 


quarantine kwarrunteen 


Jupiter, son of Saytern 


Sat-urn 


Put that in the skeddle 


schedule sheddle 


My wive's bonnet 


wife's 


Half a calve 1 s head 


calf's 


He comes from the heelands high-lands 


He's a heelander 


high-lander 


At Cheering Cross 


Charing Chair-ing- 



24 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

Ifeelforthejuffragesofthe> suffe rings 

He's gone to the East Hinjies Indies 

Tlie e-thics of Epicurus ethics eth-i'cs 

We took the alltitude al-titude 

Bring the hin-dennost { gSS* 

I am a jyner joiner joyner 

Her leg is out of jynt joint joynt 

•Tine e'm together join joyn 

In their old chaos, seas with skies shall join (jine) 
And stars with seas confounded lose their shine. 

May's Luc. b. 1. 
To the young prince she vowM ne'er -more to join (jine) 
In dull embraces with her Collatine. 

Ovid's Elegy, 8.—Sedley. 
Ennius whose muse by nature was designed 
Complete, had art with bounteous. nature joined (j' n€( i) 
iOvid Eleg. 15. — Cromwell. 

Thus Dedalus her offspring first confin'd, 

Who with a bull in. lewd, embraces join'd* (jined ) 

Ov.A.ofL.— Yolden. 

In am'rous folds the wanton serpents twine 

And dogs with their salacious females join, (jine) Id. 

Then grapes long kept, yet fresh as on the vine 
The Signian and the Syrian pear shall join, (jine) 

HolJ.s. IL 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



25 



We walked two and throw 

Well, sure-lie 

I computed it to ignorance 

They were all shag-grinned 

Fm all in a swet 

We saw a berrin 

An eppitome of history 

He is so peremtory 



to and fro 

surely 

imputed 

chagrin sher-greend 

perspiration 

bu-ri-al 

epitome e-pit-to-mee 

peremptory perrem-tory 



Ant. To-morrow be in readiness to go, 
Excuse it not for Fm peremptory. 

Two G.ofVer, a. l,s.3. 

plagiarism pladg-erism 

sh-rimps 

hogshead hogs-head 

juncture junctshur 

advertise 



Full of playgerism 
I am fond of srimps 
Less than a hogzyed 
A terrible junctur 
Advertise* for a situation 



Duke. 



But I do bend my speech 



To one that can my part in him advertise. 

M.o/M. a. l,*.l. 
Hots. Yet doth he give us bold advertisement. 

K.H.A, «.4,s.l. 
More nor a hundred more than 

Antichamber should be written ante. This error 
exists in many words. Anti is against or contrary 
to, ante, before- 

* This is good in Dnblin and has Shakespear to justify 
it passim. 



26 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



Threadle that needle .thread 

She has beautiful feeturs features feetshur 

He was very lofe at first loath 

Yet were theiv fears far greater; they suspect 
The silence of the Gods, loth to detect. 

31ay , s Luc. b. 6. 

That's a trate of character 

He does take on so 

Gim me some 

That's the very pynt 

Not for thribble as much 

Currants and reasons 

An airial voyage 

A grart o pound 

Velveteen breaches 



trait tray 

weep, lament, grieve 

give 
point poynt 

trebble 
raisins rayzuns 

aerial ay-e-rial 

groat grort 

breeches britches 



"Whose primitive tradition reaches 
As far as Adam's first green breeches. 

ButHudibras gave him a twitch 
.As quick as lightning in the breech. 

And cannons shoot the higher pitches 
The lower we let down their breeches. 

Who after proved himself a witch, 
And made a rod for his own breech. 



What a miskreent 
Gothic artshi-tecture 



miscreant mis-kree-ant 

V architecture 
I arkytecture 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE 



27 



I'm so very -moll uncolly -j 



He made a comprommis { ^!!!!!I «!r!t 

r I compromize 

Give me a neck-handkerchief a neckerchief 

The prisoner came into court wearing a red neckerchieT. 
Thistlcwood's Trial for High Treason. 

melancholy 
mellonkufiy 

XT , ... -c . , . . fa vulvar mistake for 

He hit me first, your majesty { magistrat e 

A man of great valyer valour valler 

Mind you don't blob blab 

Nature has made roan's breast no windores 
To publish what he does within doors, 
'Nor what dark secrets there inhabit, 
Unless his own rash folly blab it. — Hud. 

char- woman 

pantomime 

-pedant ped*dant 

apparent apparrunt 

threats threts 

construe k5nstru 



She's our chairwoman 
An amusing- pantonine 
A shocking peedant 
It was so appearant 
Don't mind his threets 
Can you constrew that 
Jul. Since maids in modesty say no to that 

Which they would have the profferer constsue Ay 
G.of V. a. l,s.2. 
Ver. England did never owe so sweet a hope 
So much misconstrued in his wantonness 

R. H. 4, a. 5. 5. 2. 



28 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



I purchased the fixters 


fixtures fixtshurs 


He insistes upon it 


insists 


Do you take my plod 
The sharps of my cart 
Stuck with pi ay cards 
It's the best Darby cheese 
They fowt For an hour 


plaid plad 

shafts 
placards placards 

Derby 
fought fawt 


He Iveeps his charrut 
It's English faybric 


cha-ri-ot 
fabric fab-bric 


That child is quite spylt 
I never saw sitch a thing 


spoiled spoyled 
such 


That's a very hash term 


harsh 


He took pyzun 

At a fair valleyation 

She arskes so often 


poison poyzun 

val-u-ation 

asks 


You are sure to miss of him to miss him 


In the inshuing spring- 
Never belsh 


ensuing 
eructate 


I am free to confess 
I am free to admit* 


I willing 


Chaw your wittles masticate your victuals (littles) 


Ah wretched queen ! you range the pathless wood 
While on a flow'ry bank he chaws the cud.— Dryden 


A prickling sensation 


pricking 



* This is a vile parliamentary jargon. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



29 



I've g"ot the roomitis 
A man what I know 



rheumatism roomatism 
whom or that 

{a vulgarism from man- 
ger, to eat 
venial 
chapped 
height hite 

Behold yon mountains hoary height (hate) 
Made higher with ne%v mounts of snow, 
Again behold the winter's weight 
Oppress the labouring wood below. — T>ry. Hor. 



What are you mungeing 

That's a venal error 
My hands are chopped 
it fell from a great hate 



That's irrevelant 
It stands upon trussels 
He did it extrumpery 
He made it extempoar 

Edjucated at Oxford 
Sell me some marvels 
He made the attack! 
He studies zulogy 
In futur I will do so 
It's all labour and tyle 



irrel-evant 
tressles tres-sels 

J extempore extempory 

ed-yu-ca-ted 
marbles 
attack 
zo-ol-ogy 
future fu-tshur 

toil toyl 

Hylas the hoy, Latona's erring- isle 
And Pelops iv'ry shoulder, and his toil.— Geor.3d- 
For, what thy 



Dull brain thought sea and land should bring, quick guile 
•Procures him straight.— A great crime's no great toil, (tile) 

H. J. s. 14, 



30 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

He had no remuneration remu-neration 

By the fondling hospital foundling 

They rose simmultaneously si-multaneously 

It's inheerent in him inherent inerrant 

On WIntsun Sunday, fa. { ^jj^yf f 

Put the cock in the tub put the tap 

He came out with a claw eclat a-klar 

I did so accordantly accordingly 

It curls quite natteral natural natcheral 

He was in our koips corps kore 

Take the thief out of the candle waster 

She's very econ6mi'c . economic 

The busy swarms their cyder vats prepare, 
And fill their vessels with the mellow juice, 
Refreshment cooling- for a future year 
With care economic set by for use. 

Town and Country Mag. Oct. 1771, p. 549. 

Give me those torsels tas-sels 

I take inyst sugar moist moyst 

That's a terrible weepon weapon weppon 

The vast emplrian empyrean em-pir-rean 

Now had th' Almighty Father from above 
.From the pure empyrean where he sits. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



31 



He listed for a soldier 



enlisted 



Cassar listed great number of pilots. 

Bladen's Ccssar, 6.3, cA. 
and soon listed myself in the seiviee of a Hon. 

Sped. 343. 



She's very cleenly 
As clear as krystshal 
The ancient leegends 
And so on, ad infinnitujn 
Close by the reservoy 
I did'nt ought to 
They are my parquisites 
He persistes in it 



cleanly clenly 

crystal 

legends ledg-ends 

infinitum infin-ny-tuni 

reservoir rezzerv-war 

I ought not 

per-quisites 

persists 



They have lost their franchize franchise franchis 

I saw the advertlzement advertisement adver- 



ts 1 vther this nor that 
Nayther of them 

That's a precedent 

What a contrarst 



tizment 
\ neither neether 

precedent pres-se-dent 
contrast contrast 



He's always in controversy- 
Give me my ankicher \ 

Where's the portmantle < 
My ncvvv went to him 



controversy 
contro-versy 
handkerchief 
hand-ker-chief 
portmanteau 
port-man-to 
nephew nev-yu 



32 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

Do you wear ftannea flannel 

Enquire at the ordinance office ord-nance 

T . -. „ " _' M ,i-» f ridicule, caricature, 
That s a newspaper skit | burlesque 

I didn't go so fur far 

Jiranastic exercises gymnastic ghim-nas-tics. 

That is not the pronounciation pro-nun-ciation 

An inco m pah.able adjective { ^paSe 

He put (as but) it down put (as foot) 

So many hands would to Abydos put 
Sestos: fill up the Hellespont: and cut. 

M.L.bS>. 

I want no interference interference inter-fear-ance 
The revenue is sufficient revenue revenue 

Pros. Not only with what ray revenue yielded.— Tew//. 
A teenet of the church tenet ten-et 

He is extol ed by all extolled ex-tol-d 

A very deep tragedy pathetic 

You are too voilent violent vi-o-lent 

They are a beasteal set bestial best-i-al 

The money was all in goold gold (as hold) go-Id 
He's gone on a tower tour toor 

Play the preelude preUude 

There was a consperracy conspiracy conspir-racy 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



33 



I took some jollup 
What's the wedth of it 



He was disappynted i 

They went to drownd themselves 

I hunched the hen away 

Take a heg 

What a heighth he throws height 

In hig-hth or depth, still first and last will reign. 
P. h' passim 
From what highth falTn. 



jalap jallup 

width 

disappointed 
disappoynted 

drown 

drove 

an egg 

hite 



Can yon julk 

I kalkilated myself 

Take and do it Sir 

I'm going to the haistings. 

They had a caroushal 

Kemble made his debut 

I am uncapable of it 

He's a bumbaly 

But they are kazjhulties 

That circumstarnce is untrue 

The expedition of pictures 

It was a fair transaction 

I read it in the kurrier 

The word ceiling should be 



jerk 
calculated 
do it (take is redundant) 
hustings 
carousal ca-row-sal 
deboo 
incapable 
bailiff 
ca-su-al-ties 
circumstance 
exhibition 
tr-ans-action 
courier coo-re-er 
cieling 



34 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



Can you skete 

Lend me -your pin-cushin 

That's enthusiism 

He hot him over the head 



skate 
pincushion pin-kdo&h-in 
enthusiasm 
hit 



He allowed a maintalnance 
Lend me that surringe 
A great ilteonveniency 
Take boerth of them 

Aunt deviates from all 
similar spellings 

Take a pat-ent from him 
I saw all the perzession 
The}' peeched against him 
At the crownation 
Throughout the rellum 
You take advarntage of it 
He has sarved his time 
Give me the kitchup 

And for our home-bred British cheer 
Botargc, catsup and caveer. — Swift's Mis. 

I received a woll'untine valentine val-un-tine 

He's a well eddikated man ed-u-cated 

That's a fine helium elm 

It's quite unbeknown to me unknown 

We embarked at Portchmouth Ports-mouth 



mam-te-nance 

syringe syr-ringe 

inconyeniency 

both 

arnt 

pat-tern 

pro-cession 

impeached him 

cor-o-nation 

realm relm 

ad-van-tage 
served surved. 

ketchup, olim catsup 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 35 

He keeps six klurks clerks klarks 

It was scarcely perceivable perceptible 

It cuts the fleem phlegm flein 

His throat half stopt with gross corrupted fleam 
Leasurely breathing a sulphureous steam. 

Hol.A.P.F.s.3. 
A fine gauze lettuce Cos 

He put up his orysons orisons or-re-sons 

Fill- all thy bones with aitches aches akes 

If thou neglect'st or dost unwillingly 
What I command, 111 rack thee with old cramps, 
Fill all thy bones with Sches : make thee roar 
That beasts shall tremble at thy din. — Temp, a.l, s. 2. 

' Kind heav'n let heavy curses 

Gall his old age, cramps, aches, rack his bones. 

Oltw. Veil. P. 
The shriecbes, waitings and all cries were heard 
Of every fatal and affrighting bird. — Afay\s Luc. 6.7. 
Can by their pangs and aches find 
AH turns and changes, of the wicd. 

Ache-boue, spinach. 

As no man of his own self catches 

The itch or amorous French aches. 

€l. The weariest and most loathed worldly life. 

That age, ache(ake) penury and imprisonment.* 
M.ofM.a.3,s.\. 

* The paranomasia that would exist between age 
and ache if the latter were read aitcb, renders its 
ancient pronunciation ake indisputable. 
o 



36 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

Hi-then that ladder heighten hyten 

Thafs a junkie and this is 1 jon-quil 

a chayney highster J china aster 

The current kine of the realm coin koyn 

Know then thy patrons arts to save his coin (kyne) 
Leaving the Muses' and Apollo's shrine.— Hol.Juv.s.1' 

Whose verse bears not one trivial stamp like coin, 
One whom I cannot shew, but do design. — Idem. 

I've a most done almost 

He was made the sacrifice sacrifice sack-re-fize* 

I, to the temple will conduct the crew, 

The Sacrifice and sacrrficers view-f— Geor. 3. 

Shake off dull sloth and early rise 
To pay thy morning sacrifice. 

From others and our Latin youth suffice 

They did th'infernal gods: a sacrifice. — H.J.s.Z. 

Of Polyphemus for all which the wise 
UJysses scap'd— But one does not suffice. 

H. J. s.9. 
My birth-day I far less Corvinus prize 
Than this : wherein my promised sacrifice. 

H. J. s. 12. 

* Plural sack-re-fizes. 

f Iu this instance to sound c as s would subject us to the 

suspicion of playing the fool : the psellismus Would 

be ridiculous. 



t>F THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 37 

He was a heating his dinner eating- 

He's in a different spere sphere sfere 

How mischievious yon are mischievous ralschievus 

Gods! wou'd you be ador'd for doing' good, 
Or only fear'd for proving tmschievoiis ? 

Roch* Valent* 

The ornaments of the cornish cornice komis 

I was attackted by two attacked 

Give us a chaw jack quid 

He lives at Tatnam Cross Tottenham 

Abominable hinnyquitty iniquity 

Did they porlt him ? pelt 

He*s so prevefse perverse 

Tales of the G eni genii ge-ne-i 

The padroll came up patr5le pertrole 

The gyarden is covered with dyu from the skyie,* 
Get some reddishes rad-ishes 

He is very phlegmatic flem-attic 

Covered with salliver saliva sa-ly-ver 

The farriner of the flower cup farina fa-ry-ner 
Bring the hile oil oyl 

It is so incontrovertibly incon-tr5v-ertibly 

Roman cemment ee-ment 

Have you a shittlecock? shuttlecock 

* These are vulgarisms of the stage. 



38 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

It's very exstrawnary extra-ordinary 

As sour as warjus verjuice vir-juse 

You dear little darlin darling 

It's a capital stomatic stomachic sto-mak-ik 

There is a mense difference an immense 

I did it from koartesy courtesy kurt-ercy 

There's a black beedle beetle 

Take away the pealings parings 

The hinjens came en-gines 

And were invented first from en-gines, 
As Indian Britains were from pen-guius— HwL 
It's made of peth pith 

He's a paytriot pat-riot 

I had a pain in the habdomal abdomen 

She put it in her buzzum bosom boos-um* 

Bring me a small highunf iron i-run 

On glowing ir'n and smoak sent from his trade 
From coal, tongs, anvil, upon which are made 

HolhJuv. 
That after burns with cold as much 
As ir'n in Greenland does the touch— -Hud. 
Ah me what perils do environ 
The man that meddles with cold iron.— i&itf. 

* It is not possible to convey graphically the sound 
of this word: it is neither bo-znm, nor boo-zum. The 
sound of the o in woman in the best approximation. 

f It would appear by the couplets here given that 
this vulgarism is of long- standing. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



39 



He's a sayterest 
I hates the papishes 
It turns on a pevot 
The C5nsistory court 
It's upon record 



satirist sat-ir-ist 

papists 

piv-ot 

Con-sls-tory 

record rek-urd 



Thankless false wretch ? I'st nothing that th'art now 
Upon record a man. — Uoll.Juv. 

Her matchless sons whose valour still remains 
On French records for twenty long campaigns. 

Swift's Mis. 
But Faunus came from Picus, from Picus drew 
His birth from Saturn, if records fee true. 

Dry. Mn. b. 7, v. 74. 

Hippolitus, as old records have said, 

Was by his stepdam sought to share her bed 

D.jE. b. 7, v. 1049. 

Ang. Mine were the very cipher of a function 

To fine the faults, whose fine stands in record, 
And let go by the actor, — M. of M. a. 2,s. 2. 



What's that stomping about? 
Are the warnuts good ? 
He came unaware upon me 
The liquor must be fomented 
He's in the millintary 
A tippogfaphical error 
He's a misantrofist 



stamping 

wallnuts 

un-a-wares 

fermented 

mil-i-tary 

ty-po-graph-i-cal 

mis-an-thro-pist 



40 VULGARISMS AN IM PRO PHI BTIES 



A beautiful peranum 
A desultory conversation 
He frequents the park 
But you have not hcerd me 



gm-m-uHi 

des-tiltdry 

frequents 

heard hurd 



In temples too majestic more appear'd, 

And Rome a voice almost at midnight heard. 

Hoi. Juv.sA. 



Very fine beastes indeed 
He's too sensible by far 
That's no think to you 
I met with a haxident 
Give him a nint of it 
An irrepairable loss 
The pot-entates of Europe 
It was the tother man 
At the pottekerry's shop 
The spessific gravity 
Officers wear applits 
At the demyse of his son 
He analyzed a fortune there 
An excellent hortchester 
He's in the new Pollis 
The Lord Leftenant 
You make me a reddicule 
He's a Porterghee 



beasts 
sensitive 
nothing 
an accident 

a hint 
ir-rep-arable 
po-ten-tates 

the other 

Apoth-e-caries 

specific spe-siffic 

epaulettes ep-er-lets 

demise de-meez 

realized 

orchestra or-kes-ter 

Police poleece 

lieutenant lyu-ten-ant 

ridicule 

Por-tu-guese 



momentous, 
ma-men-tus 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 41 

What an hegoatist egotist eg-o-tist 

The state of the f i-nances fi-nan-ces 

It is a moraentshous question*/ 

He's my coadjutor coad-ju-tor 

The marriteem power maritime marrytim 
Your conjunction was right conjecture conjec-tshur 

Oriential literature o-ri-en-tal 

Were you at Room ? Rome R-home 
The committ-he settled it committee commltty 

I respect the clargey clergy klurjey 

That's a fine tarrier terrier terry-yer 
A bran new hat bran, a common vulgarism 

Its a very onfit thing un-fit 

What a romarnce romance romanse 

Thenky sir thank you 

He took out a paytent patent pat-ent 

I have not leezure leisure lez-yur 

She busted her stays burst 

A pound of sassages sausages sawsages 

With a white hog's pure sasages still crave 
in sound body, a sound mind so brave. 

Holy day's Juv. 

— yet thy large dish 

And full fat sasage make the gods delay. 

Hoi. A. P. F, 



42 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



He made his apothe-o-sis apotheosis ap-per-the-osis 



What gibberidge ! 


gib-ber-ish 


I'm all in a presperation 


per-spiration 


That's only your hipsy dixy 


ipse dixit 


Taste these pruherns 


prunes proons 


He perposes to do so 


purposes 


One might as lief be hanged 


as well 


Goggle your throat 


gargle 


He sets for the mayor 


sits 


I saw them gullonteened 


guillotined ghllloteend 


As tender as a chick 


chicken 


The King's anniversary 


anni-ver-sary 


Put on the trivvit 


trev-et 


Fill the kittle 


ket-tle 


A sulferrous smell 


sulphureous sutfurious 


Gether that wristband 


gath-er 


I'd just as soon pay 


as willingly 


Just upon the instrip 


instep 


What a pretty babby 


baby 


I want the pinchers 


pincers 


It's made of pinchback 


pinch-beck 


The cap is nicely pleeted 


plaited 


Plat that string 


plait 


The malecontents are defeated mal-contents 


Your premyzes are false 


premises prem-misses 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 43 

It is of the last imporetance impor-tance 

A monarchial government monarchical 

Take it haulternately al-ternately 

He refuted his opponent 6p-p5-nent 

He obtained a mandamus man-da-raus* 

She's a despicable woman despicable 
They are just gelherd gathered' 

Environned by enemies cn-vT-ronned 

Into the wild expanse and through the shock 
Of fighting elements, on all sides round- 
Environ'd wins his way. — P. L.b. 2. 
TV affrighted forum with arm'd men beset, 
Drawn swords environing the judgment seat. 

May*sLucan. 
Ah me what perils do environ 
The man that meddles with cold iron. — H» 
But darkness and the gloomy shade of death 
Environ you. — K. H. 6, a. 5, s. 4. 
It was a complete fayler failure fale-yur 

He lept right in leaped leept 

They did it so, like— they turned it round, like.* 
Well, you know, I says nothing— so, you know.f 
His circumstarnces are bad circum-stan-ces 

She is not rich by no means She is by no means rich 

* A silly and vulgar manner of speaking 

f This repetition of you know and says I, is miserably 



44 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



At his grand climakterrik climacteric klf-mer-terrik 
Bring some water creases cresses kresses 

The subhaultern officers subaltern, subbletun 

Abr. Be it thy care to haste Humphryminos 

And Cliristophorides to this night's council, 
While each, subaltern chief prepares the men. 

The Taylors, a. f, s.-U 

She spoke in a cojitemtible way con-temp-tu-ous , 
They are grannydeers grenadiers, grennerdeers 
It's a grea.t phenomena phenomenon 

Agenst the wall against a-gaynst 

They fixed their baggurnets bayonets bay-yur-nets 



Give me the ropper 
An appalling catusfrQaf , 
It is indisputable 
It was done in privvicy 
He called of me yesterday . 
I saw the combat 
The fault of goverment 
Mind as you don't 
I dislike highrunny 
A tremendjus blow 
Most flag-rant conduct 
A handsome shondileer 
It's not obligatory 
That's very presumtchus 



wrapper rapper 

catastrophe katastrofee 

indisputable 

prl-va-cy 

upon me 

c5mbat 

govern-ment 

omit as 

irony Trrunny 

tremendous tremendus 

fla-grant 

chandelier shandileer 

obligatory 

pre-sump--tu-ous 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 45 

Theantipoads of the world antipodes an-tip-po-dees 
That is not ap-plic-able appli-cable 

Subjected to wrong- subjected 

Orl. I rather will subject me to the malice. 

As you like it, a.2,s.3. 
Pros. Subject his coronet to his crown. — Temp. a. 1 ,s.2. 
All powerful love, what changes canst thou cause 
In human hearts, subjected to thy laws. 

Dry.JEn.b.A, v. 596. 
Subjected joyntly to three lords how ill 
Prove shared rules accords, and fatal still. 

May's LucaVj b. 1 . 
I don't like his insults insults* 

It' s quite arbitary arbi-tra-ry 

He halenated her affections a-le-.un-ated 

A clandestine match clandestine klan-des-tin 

An exemplary man exemplary 

They are fanatics fan-a-ti'es 

With monstrous shapes and sorceries 'abusM 
Fanatic Egypt and her priests.— P. L.6.1,?.4S0.r 

Yet hypocrite fanatics cry 

I'm but an idol raised on high. — Swift. 

Ensnared by this wily trick 

We fairly caught the fanatic. 

If you do do it if you do it 

Don't tittle me so tickle 

What a bominable story . an abominable . 



46 



VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



The hawk huvvured over hovered hovvurd 

The act was compulsory compulsory 

The twelve apossles apostles apos-tels 

There's a shizzum between us schism siz-zum 



I went to the horritories 
The King's perrogertive 
He's a lunatic 
She thev a petticoat 

Horrible matchinations 



oratorios orrer-toer-e-ose 
prerogative 
lunatic 
thieved, but stole is better 

{machinations 
mackinnashons 



A fine numparell 
The common shore 
Give me leaf 
By gradatory steps 
He cut his wine pipe 
Columbus was a Genoee 
He is my pardoner 
An issolated situation 
The constellation Oar-eon 



nonpareil non-par-el 

sewer suer 

leave 

grad-atory 

windpipe 

Genoese 

part-ner 

i-so-lated eye-solated 

Orion O-rl-on 



• why does the side 



Of sword bearing Orion shine too bright? 

May's Lucan t 1.1. 
Not thicker billows beat tbeLybian main 
When pale Orion sets in wintry rain. 

D.JE. b. 7, r- 995. 

He hev the stick at me threw 

It's all in rags and totters tatters 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 47 

She is very kolleric choleric kolleric 

That is ginerally done gen-erally 

What howdacity audacity or-dassity 

Five chawdron of coals chaldrons charldrons 

They are detarmined upon it determined 

He's an impotent old fellow impotent 

He's quite frenertk fre-net-ic 

The avenue to the house avenue 

Guns always rekile recoil recoyl 

The soldier's rayshnns rations rashuns 

Rashioshination is reason ratiocination ras-e-os- 

e-na-shion 
That weighs 14 stun stone 

In the zeeneth zenith zen-ith 

■ And with the setting- sun 
Dropt from the zenith like a falling- star. 

P. L.b. l,/.74o. 

I shued him for the debt sued . sood 

The negoshiashion succeeded [ negociation 

fe ( negocea-shon 

He came from Newfoundland Newfoundland 

Dont lighter about loiter loytet 

She is very ornary ordinary 

I threw it out at window out of the window 

She detterated my character deteriorated 

By that means the velocity > accelerated 

was exbilerated $ 



48 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



My fingers are nummd benumbed 

As lissom as ever lightsome or lithesome 

He served me with pros-sess process pro-ses 

By policy and long- process of time 

In emulation opposite to heaven 

P.h. b. 2, /.297. 
The ghist of the matter is this gist jist 

He was inexorable inex-orable 

Read that track tract 

•Every linniment of his face lineament liw-ne-ar-ment 
His phis-ognomy is bad phisiognomy phisi-on-omy 
Very penurious to the health injurious 

She has no animosity about her animation 






Many will repent his death 
It's quite an enigmy 
He tis.ilicated his arm 
They chucked stones at him 
He put a coddikle 
His executors will pay 
That's clear plrracy 
You are too precipitant 
He learned me that 
That's misfortunate 
Lend me your razure 
With malice propense 
Accused of si-mo-ny 



regret 

enigma e-nig-mer 

dislocated 

threw 

cod'ici'l coddisel 

executors 
piracy pye-rer-cy 

precipitate 

taught 

unfortunate 

razor ray-zer 

prepense 

si-m-ony 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



49 



I were just saying so 
Very disadvarntageous 
7'hafs always his toepic 
From Folmouth to Bath 
He engros-ses all the talk 
I came in contract with 
A hryled mackerel 
I'm ashamed on you 
I sent her to the salt mashes 
She never larnt that 
It was quite trarnsient 
He a-lee-ne-ated her heart 
A civil orange 

Beat. The Count is neither sad, nor sick, nor merry, 
nor well j but civil Count, civil as an orange. 
M.A.a.N.a.2,8.1. 



I was 

disadvantageous 

topic top-ic 

Falmouth 

en-groce-es 

contact 

broiled broyled 

of you 

marshes 

learned 

tran-sient 

alien-ated 

Seville 



She's as deep as Garrick 

He was ondressed 

By a leaf 

Without my leaf 

During his mayoraltry 

The pennal laws 

iHe gave him a hiding 

They summonsed me 

He was pillard 

The very refuge of society 



An unmeaning vulgarism 

undressed 

by your leave 

leave 

mayoral-ty 

penal pee-nal 

beating ' 

summoned 

pilloried pillo-rid 

refuse ref-yuse 



50 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



She gets paroatchal relief 
Arline plumbs 
We had such a pedigree 
Put the led on the pot 



parochial paro-keal 
Orlean 
a prolix detail 
lid 



Evn, in poetry must be read e'en, and not even 
It takes away the tedeum 
I never went furder 
So much fending and proving 
Quite permiskusly 
He only wants it temporal 
This house is to let 
I'm in such a treemor 
It's against the lidge 
Upon a leer stomach 
There was such a fraykus fracas 
He is so precautious 
They danced a minuet 
The pieces are sawdered 
It's summut short 
I shall see you ere long ere* air 

J can neither set nor lay sit nor lie 

In High Park Hyde 

Give me a hyst up hoist hoyst 

You are very hawkerd awkward hawkwud 

That was not the casion of it occasion 

* E'er for ever is pronounced air. 



tedium 

further 

recrimination 

promiscuously 

for a time 

to be let 

trem-or 

ledge 

empty 

frerkar 

cautious 

minuet 

soldered 

somewhat 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



5L 



rind 



The rebels were tainted 

He is a surgentat law 

They threshed the corn 

That's a brick-kill 

As black as a negur 

She is so rascible 

Who is the crowner 

They purshued them 

I have taken physic 

Made of hog's brussels 

He bemeans himself much 

Throw away the rine 

On board the boar city oar 

Titty-one is not far from Algiers 

His Ship is the Billy RufFun 

You are too cute for me 

He larnt me that 

They were betrothed (like moth) betrothed betroathed 

Will this road fetch me to ) . t 

the Borough $ taKe 

Upon haulternate days alternate al-tur-nit 

They nearly rod over me rode 

She conkered in my opinion concurred kon-kurd 

That's in jommitry ge-oin-etry 

Up two pair of stairs in the second floor 

The Queen is the King's concert consort 



attainted 

serjieant sarjent 

thrashed 

kiln 

negro 

irascible 

coroner 

pursued persood 

medicine medsun 

bristles brissels 

degrades 

rynd 
bon citoyen 

Tetuan 

Belbrophon 

acute 

taught 



52 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



He received cannon ization 
His hopes were railised 
A bit of a scrummage 
Go and git it 



cannonization 

real-ised 

skirmish 

get 



That's a mausoleum 

Full to the bottom 

The letters are flummigated 

For fraid of the plague 

Look upard 

He was the plantiff 

It's now in a likkid state 

I have no noledge 

He Tmp5rtuned 



mausoleum maw-so-le-um 
from 
fumigated 
from a fear 
upward 
plain-tiff 
liquid lik-wid 

knowledge nol-lidg 
importuned Tmpor-tuned 



And importun'd by Ceres to remove, 
Prefers the fields below to those above. 

Z>.GU,57» 
Merch. You know since Pentecost the sum is due, 
And since I have not much importun'd you. 

C. of F. a. 4, s. 1. 
Duke. ■ "We shall write to you 

As time and our concernings shall importune. 

M.ofM.a.^s.h 
Seb, You were kneel'd to and importun'd otherwise. 

Temp. a. 2,s. 1. 



I'll rekonnytur first 
She barns a living 



{ 



reconnoitre 
rer-kon-uatrer 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 53 

What a fine he-ko echo ek-ko 

Hollor out loud halloo hal-lew 

They put in a distrain distraint 

They were cotemperry writers cotempo-ra*ry 
It's a fine corjal cordial kor-di-al 

Be more consillytory con-cil-i-a-tory 

The redgimental strength regimental ridg-men-tal 
That's fine brokkilo brocoli brok-kolee 

Beautifully embrydered embroidered embroy-durd 
She braded me for it up-braided 

Tve got a pain in my bouls bowels bou-ills 

The arm was hampertated am-pu-ta-ted 

I g ive you my sakred word sacred say-kred 

He took the sakrament sacrament saykrament 

All this ly velong day liv-long 

You are too blusterous boisterous or blustering 

Do it immedatly immediately immeej-ately 

^Yee from ghe-yile guile ghile 

Polly-gamy exists in Turkey polygamy polig-amy 
That's a very pyne-ant remark poignant poin-yant 
Put a spile in the barrel spill 

He's starnch enough stanch, staunch stawnch 

Animals feel as much as christians as men 
None of your rallery rail-lery 

That's the statty law statute statyute 



5± VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

Mrs; Siddons was very deep pathetic, impressive 
A great stigmy upon him stigma stigmer 

She's so fond of vittripation vituperation 

He has got a fistulow on his finger whit-low 
Take that slug from the fire slag 

Among the hanshents ancients ayn-shents 

An ounce of ekkyfortis aqua fortis 

Those are fine apricocks apriGOts 

The apricocks coming from Epire were called Mala 
Epirotica. — Sir W. Temple's Misc. p. 2. 



Examine the artchives 


archives ar-kivs 


Here is yourn 


yours 


That's a fine polony 


Bologna 


She pised it in her hand 


poised joysed 


In starling money 


sterling stur-Iing 


I want a tempory loan 


tem-po-ra-ry 


Will you obleege me 


oblige o-bly-ge 


He vampt up that himself 


made 


Don't worret me 


worry 


The banisters are broken 


balusters 



So he rekd his vengeance on me wreaked reekd 

At all events* in all events 

Ske's a hoor whore ore 

* We sa}- at all hazards, at all risk?, but in all events, 
ia ali cases, in all circumstances. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 55 

The Brigand chief brigand 

^Ye went in a post shay post chaise 

Pray, sir, where' s the wissery viscera vis -ser-rcr 

You are too wishus vicious vishus 

He's a viscount viscount viscount 

It must be paid in speecy specie spee-she 

Upon the wensket wainscot wens-cut 

In the Archipelago Arke-peMgj 

The atarn of the ship • stern sfurn 

I am a supernumery super-numerary 

The pain's a good deal leevated alleviated 

They mast be mellerated { ^t^at'd 
What a fust you make fuss 

He's of great statue stature statshur • 

The Philippics of Demosthenes Philippics 

— Fd write lines as ill. 

Rather than thee, divine Philippic, bo'd. 

Roll y day' sJav. 
That's a kimmera chimera ky-in>rar- 

Herculean strength Her-cu-le-an 

With thrse he long sustain'd th* Hercultaa ana 
And these I wielded when my blood was warm. 

Dri'.2En.b.?> y r.bb3, 
His last weak heads; let that Herculean nrght 
Thatlopt the first and strongest off in fijrht. 

Luc.6 t p, 95 



56 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



Rense that glass 
A man of proess 
Their ornary nutritur 
They are a tumultus set 
He's a perfect vagabon 
You are a sad gal 



rinse 

prow-ess (as how) 

ordinary nutriture 

tumultuous 

vagabond 

girl gurl 



Plighted his troth (as moth) troth 



troath 



It's true the knave has takeiTs oath 
That I robb'd him — well done in troth. 



Mount Cavalry 
They were soadyers 
Let's have a shy 
He was in joppordy 
Upon the reteena 
Feed them with grunsel 
He spew'd all about 
Die sun try broke out 
She's quite a skillington 
The pro of the vessel 



Calvary 
soldiers solejers 

throw 

jeopardy jeppurdy 

ret-in-a 

groundsel 

was ill 

dysentery dis-sun-try 

skel-e-ton 

prow (how) 



Moving- they fight: with oars and forky prows 
The froth is gather'd, and the water glows. 

Dry. JEn. 6.8, v. 918. 

Exact in time with equal strokes they row, 
At once the brushing oars and brazen prow 
Dash up the sandy waves and ope the depths below. 
Dry.jEn, ft. 5, v. 187. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE 



57 



I ought to, sartainly 

Put down five and orfc 

The bells pelled famously 

I took some lectry 

I hate chickennery 

The bite was kotterised 

The criminal trlb-unal 

You are very unpolite 

You must bile it; 

Unparellelled 

Unseperated 

Mackarel; 

She baide me do it bade 

What luxury, with vain ajnbition had 
Sought through the world, and not as hunger bad. 

Luc. b. 10. 

Is am so hennivated en-er-va-ted 

She rediculed him rid-i-culed 

I'll tell you for why omit for 

I come straightways! H for. why ? what should I do? 

Shan't I go to my love when she doth woe? 

Hoi. A. P. F. 



are thus generally 
improperly spelt. 



I ought, certainly 

five and nought 

pealed 

e-lec-tu-ary 

chicanery chik-kay-nery 

cauterized kor-ter-ized 

tribunal try-bu-nal 

impolite 

boil 

unparalleled 
unseparated 
mackerel 

bad ; 



He has no rimminissense 
I did it haphazard 
Hullo, there 
What's the lenth of it 
It's the hakmer of folly 



rem-i-nis-cence 

a gross vulgarism 

halloo 

length leng-th 

ac-me 



58 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

She helt it so tight held 

He rowld it along the road rolled roaled 

Mows off his head, the trunk a moment stood, 
Then sunk and rowld* along the sand in blood. 

Dry.jEn.b, 10 
The horse was all of a larder. lather 

How it burns and fobs throbs 

A score on us went of us 

I'm not afeard of you afraid 

She is so tinimersum timorous tlm-mdr-us 

The enemy was anniliated an-ni-hilated 

The wine and et cseteras wine et csetera 

They mutineered mutinied 

I have had a country exertion excursion 

It's a tippical error typical ty-pe-cal 

She's a molloter mulatto 

The beography of Newton bl-og-raphy 

Her dress is so conspikkus con-spic-u-ous 

The dinnisty of the Bourbons dynasty dy-nas-ty 
It's in the gran-ery granary grain-ary 

They are without any recourse resource 

The sinnud of the Jews synod sT-nud 

Well have ye judg'd, well ended long debate, 
Synod of fools, and like to what ye are 

P. L, 

* Rowl passim 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



59 



I can't koop with you 
My misses told me so 
Satan is the adversary 
It was done bonerfider 
The allies resisted that 
It is, for what he knows 
Such a mlssel-any 
A vast cirkilation 
He's ammi'nable to law 
I can dissolve that question 
She keeps a larndry 
Half arter four 
The ile* of the church 
Look at the cows tits 
Where's the mannijery 
Go forrard, go afore 
A legible opportunity 
It's a constant tile 



cope 

mistress 

adver-sary 

bona fide fidce 

allies 

aught 

misceilany mis-sel-any 

circulation 

a-me-na-Ve 

resolve 

laundry lorn-dry 

half after 
aisle ab 

teats 

menagerie inenazhjery 

forward, before 

an eligible 

toil toy! 



While crowing cocks the lab'rers sloth revile 
And summon. wretches to their daily toil. 

Ovid's 6 Elff/o 
A capital sullibub syllabub 

He licked him well beat 

That's a fine ship sheep 

It's nowheres else in no other place 

* ?lk is a gross error, it is aisle^ the French word for 
-wing, and should be pronounced ale. 



60 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

He is highly inde-kore-ous indecorous indek-korus 

A cust young dog cursed 

The payjuntry of the court pageantry pad-jentre 

The three per cent consuls con-sols 

A state of bewtitude. be-at-i-tude 

I like peace pudding. peas peeze 

We were opset in a ditch upset 

Leave the door upon the jap- ajar 

I ask thee not to spread the foldings wide, 
Keep it at jar, I'll swiftly by thee slide 

Ovid's 6 Elegy, unknown, 

I follow my vacation vo-cation 

Can you speak Jarm an, German 

The King was disposed deposed 

The 1st Regiment of Livegnards* Life guards 
I dess say indeed I dare to say 

Lend me a dixonery dictionary dic-shun-ary 

It's not for the valiy of it value val-you , 

Put your signetur signature signatshur 

He belongs to the quire, (quire is obsolete) now 
choir, koyr. 
A crack of thunder suddenly, with lightning, hail, 

and fire, 
Fell on the church and tower here and ran into the 
choir, (quire) 

* In contradistinction we presume to the First Regiment 
of Deadguards. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



61 



Write your nishles 

Near the Eufraits 

They act in marces 

The door has no ketch 

They put him to a nonplush 

They tackted us in the lane 

What a sight of nuts 

Tried at the sizes 

It passes through the refradj-J" 
ertory 

She lost her redicule 

In Lambeth mash 

Do it at your apparel 

He's very insinnivating 

They warnt there 

She is so mashated 

Mix it with rozzum 

Eliza -favours my aunfc 



initials in-ish-als 

Eu-phra-tes 

mas-ses 

catch 

non-plus 

attacked 

quantity 

as-sizes 

refrigeratory 

re-fridg-er-atory 

ret-i-cule 

marsh 

peril 

insinuating 

were not ; 

emaciated e-mash-e-ated 

rosin- roz-zin 

resembles 



I 



A-dressing, a-going, a-doing dressing, going, doing 
Here's a fine sco vy duck. Muscovy 

She is a rail garnsey cow. real Guernsey 

A good deal of larfture laughter larfter 

It changed the whole mask "I 

of his blood r masS 

The wollimteers fired a wolley volunteers, volley 
An old yo ewe yu 



62 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



The very drugs of the people dregs 

He sat up better than an hour* more 

A great, rev-erbration rever-Vr-ation 

We are not fameelyer familiar fam-mil-yur 

That question I can dissolve solve 

A long drovvth drought drovvt 

And never quenched fires: but ages drorght 
Left thee not so much as would put out 

May's Lucan b. 2. 

And crickets sing at the oven's mouth, 

As the blither for their drowth. — Per. of Tyre, a. 3 



Near the monniment 
Such a mickstur. 
In the environs 
I. bet him at that 
He is a libertine 
A gutral sound 
Do it graddlely 
Gum arabaek 
They formed a colition 
For your commodation 
He sloshed me all over 
The bell tolld (pol) 
The right of the suvren 



mon-u-ment 
mixture mickstshur 

environs 
beat beet 

lib-ber-tin 

guttural gut-ter-ul 

grad-u-ally 

Arabic 

co-aJition 

ac-com-mo da-tion 

sluiced si used 

tolled, as rolled 
sovereign sov-ren 



* Tuiks, Ju!y-7th, 1832, Sir Walter Scott. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 63 



Look for the bellowses 


bellows 


I want to squench my thirst 


quench 


Fetch me a chiscake 


cheese cake 


He is in my employ 


employment 


A good many on 'em 


of them 


She fell plump in 


•plumb 


all unawares 





Fluttering his pennons vai.i, plumb down he drops 

P. L. b, 2, v. 928. 

He goes of messenges messages 

I watched his jesters gestures jest-shurs 

It was a black un a black one 

That letter is izzod zed 

Two spoonfuls spoonsful 

Now he fares his voice rears reers 

If man knows not! how he denies! and rears frares) 
To'ce and set face ! by the Sun beams he swears 

h. j. s. ia 

But could a Vascan be a true 
Stoic in old Metellus' days!— Now where 
Don't they a Greek aud Latine Athens rear (rare) 

H. J. s. 15. 
As Romulus a wolf-did rear, (rare) 
So he was dry nurs'd by a bear. — Hud. ■ » g 

A serpent from her left was seen to rear (rare) 
His flaming crest and lash the yielding air. 

Pope's Thebaic 



64 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



The hambrv, Westmister 
The veternary college 
Like convulsion fits 
In the serag-lio 
I drawed in ray horns 
They are leaden iras 
A foot in deamiter 
The ambassador's sute 
A hedgebone of beef 
Covered with wordergrees 
That house yunder 
An inventory was taken 
I have no objections 
Eleegiac poetry 

Hence hymning Tyburns elegiac lines 

Hence journals, medleys, Merc'ries, magazines. 

Pope's Dun 

It is a great luksh-erry 
The money was own to me 
He says such rum things 



almonry, Westminster 

veterinary ve-terry-nary 

convulsive 

se-ray-li-o 

drew 

leaden ones 

di-am-eter 

suite sweet 

ache-bone aytchbun 

verdegris 

yonder 

Inventory 

objection 

e-le-gi-ac 



He is my prentice 
In his wun-ted manner 
She is very unprudent 
That's very unproper 
The sowthern provinces 
A fine spanull 



luxury lags-erry 

owing 

comical 

apprentice 

wonted want-ed 

imprudent 

improper 

southern suthern 

spaniel spanyel 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 65 

Peace to his mains manes may-nees 

The pUnish'd crime shall set my soul at ease, 
And lnurm'ring manes of my friends appease. 

Dry.JEn. b.2, v. 300. 
Hail, oh ye holy manes; hail again, 
•Paternal ashes, now review'd in vain. 

firing him wi' you with you 
•Gi' us hold of it give us 

He's a horniment to his wife an ornament 
It was a fortin to him fortune fortchun 

He passed a lowjum on me an eulogium 
On shrorf Tuesday shrove 

That's a mezzeftint metz-zotint 
Holt there, let's drink hold 

It was very opportune Opportune 



• the murkiest den 



The most oppSrtune place, the strongest suggestion. 
Temp. a. 3, s. 2. 
■ - ' perhaps in view 

Of those bright confines, whence with neighb'ring arms, 
And oppSrtune excursion. — P. L. b. 2. 

Is it not a picter ? pic-ture 

She's always scything so sigh-ing 

He made prog-ress pro-gress 

They are Prush-ans Prussians Proo-shuns 

They are Rooshans 'Russians Rush-uns 



60 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



•He is a barrownite 
At the wine worts 
An excellent sortment 
The best Barrick pork 
The yellow jarnders 
He is a learned man 
I solvi marchandise 
He has not perseverance 
Slie is too gallish 

We furredged in every corner* 
All garsconade Gas-co-nade 



baronet 

vaults 

as-sortment 

Berwick 

jaundice jawndis 

learned lurnd 

mer-chan-dise 

perse-ve-rance 

girlish gurlish 



i 



I did it at fust 
The Whole firnament 
The King's fawkner 
He always quiwicates 
I read it quite cursory 
The skin was skorated 
We took a jarnt to Ham 
You always tarnt him 
The wosship of the gods 
A spank in the face 
An ex-quis-ite poem 
The guards re-vol-ted 
A grievious affair 



first furst 

fir-ma-ment 

fal-co-ner 

e-quiv-o-cates 

cursorily 

ex-co-ri-ated 

jaunt jawnt 

taunt tawnt 

worship wurship 

slap 

exquisite 

re-voal-ted 

griev-ous 



* This word is a vulgarism clerived from foflfrer or 
fourrager. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. #7 

Can you substanshit that ? J ^££^Sft 

Do it agen I come back by the time 

Go Phrygians to your Dindymus agen, 
Go less than women, in the shapes of men. 

D. JE. b. 9, v. 845. 

In various forms appear agen, 

Of vegetables, brutes, and men. — Swift. 

Where's the permit permit 

He was completely- bet beaten 

They fit for an hour fought 

That's a mofrodite her-maph-ro-dite 

The Suthuc bridge Southwark Southwuk 

You have torn your haypun apron ay-pron 
An acknowledged interpolation Tnter-polation 

Go to an opthalmist oph>thal-mist (of th) 

Shall I begin agen? again 

The bulls redeem'd breath open air agen, 
Next by the feet, they drag him from his den. 

D. JE. b. 3, v. 356 

Grins horrible, retires and turns again, 
Threats his distended paws and shakes his mane 
D.jE. b. 9, V.10T4. 

His certain state depends, see here in Spain 
The fainting Hydra yet shoots forth again. 

Luc, b. 0, p. 9 



68 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



1 he asplenade is finished 

A beautiful vayse 

Do you know his geneology 

What amazing ordossity 

We saw the ar-se-nal 

He made a memoranda of it 

I should think it ware 

Write down imprimis 

Blind from catarack 

Make a surrup of it 

The goose was personated ' 
by a boy 

They were start naked 

Make the girt tighter 

The passyfic ocean 

A book of antidotes 

Bay some Bambury cakes 

Where is Dovor? 



es-ple-nade 
vase vorze 

gene-al-ogy 

audacity ordassity 

arse-nal 

memorandum 

it were wur 

Imprimis 

cataract 



syrup 



girth 



syr-rup 
performed 

stark 

gerth 
pa-clf-ic 
anecdotes 
Ban-bury 

Dover 






Get the dog a parnch 
The memmoyrs of Swift 
You mourn in your sleep 
T harnd it honestly 
An excellent compacity 



He set a figure to discover 

If you were fled to Rye or Dover. 

H.P.2,c. I. 
paunch pawnch 

memoirs mem-wors 

moan 

earned urnd 

ca-pacity 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



69 



A frivolous pre-text 
I did it quite fortusly 
An ounce of vitrul 
Wash my ankeen jacket 
Covered with wurts 
The men carried flamboys 
A pretty Cat and Wheel 
She is a seamstress 
By an au-gust monarch 
Take harer one 
Leave go 
It's a hay nous offence 



pre-text 

for-tu-it-ous-ly 

vit-ri-ol 

nan-keen 

warts 

flambeaux (bows) 

Catherine Wheel 

semstr'iss 

august or-gust 

take either 

release your hold 

heinous he-nus 



Perhaps thou shalt not die, perhaps the fact 

Is not so haiuous now P. L. b.9, v. 929. 



All his adherents 

I can't abear it 

She rifles my temper 

A sudden gush of wind 

The epo of the Egyptians 

Set on fire by incenderies 

Made with plateena 

The statute at Charing Cross 

He aynt done it 



ad-he-rents 

bear 

ruffles 

gust 

epoch ep-uk 

incendiaries 

plati'na plat-m-ner 

sta-tue 

has not 



She carries his minnitur 
He mortgaged ids estate 
Ax him about it 



miniature minni-tshur 
mortgaged mor-gaged 

ask 



70 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



It rains very hard 
He's stinted in growth 
He's stunted in food 
I took it to rise my spirits 
A frequenter of plays 
Adun, let me alone 
Blessed with a wife 
What does he keer 
I kotched the ball 
Don't be darnted 
It was all tangled together 
The thing is mewtshal 
His back is wailed all over 
Her parrentage is good 
As he was wunt_ 
It's rize and progress 



fast 

stunted 

stinted 

raise 

frequenter 

have done 

blest 

care 

caught 

daunted dawnted 

entangled 

mu-tu-al 

whealed 

parentage pair-ent-age 

wont want 

rise rice 



TV Egpytians say the sun has twice 
Shifted his setting and his rise. 



Be stiddy 

He was a stipenderry 

I was at the berryal 

It's in my drorze 

She is a dossil creature 

She enjoys very bad health 



steady steddy 

stipendiary sti-pen-di-ary 

burial bew-re-al 

drawers draw-ers 

docile do-syle 

she endures, 

experiences 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 71 

He recovered his illness his health 

The bishop is very kuvve-tous covetous* kuvvi-tshus 

^ow I find, the noise is wind windf 

I have woonded it up wound wownd 

That is the korrollary corollary ker-rol lary 

I am so lonesome solitary 

He's a shocking- lusty fellow lustful 

The texter is very fine texture tecks-tshur 

How dry I am thirsty 

He is a debbertchee debauchee deb-ber-shee 

Moyshen it well first moisten moysteu 

What nasty talents you've got talons 

Hand over the taykel tackle tak-kle 

1 will not imbryle myself embroil em-broyl 

They were in-dict-ed indicted in-di-ted 

The mashes of the net meshes 

Please to except my respects accept 

*. - * In most of the^Pronouncrhg Dictionaries the or- 
thoepy given is kuvetus, but this is erroneous, and arise? 
from an alteration of the orthography, which was for- 
merly covetuous. The proper pronunciaton is covetshus. 
The orthography is altered: the orthoepy retained. 

•f Wind should be pronounced as sinn'd, tinn'd, 
and should never be made to jingle with mind, find, &c. 
a word can have hut one pronunciation. It is the only 
•one in English that is anomalous in this respect, from 
an improper adherence to a vulgarism, which should he 
gotten rid of. 



VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



Have you the dublicate du-pli-cate 

It's stewed to a mammy mummy 

Power out your tea pour pore 

He squirted it out of his mouth spirted 

She was quite conwulsed convulsed 



Take this instid 


instead in-sted 


You are a septic 


sceptic skeptic 


Under the shadder of a tree 


shadow shad-doe 


1 want another piller 


pillow pil-loe 


She gets up very ere-ly 


early er-ly 


They all had staffs 


staves 


I'm not very petiklar particular per-tik-ku-ler 


He is a gineral 


gen-eral 


It was quite transmogrified 


changed 


Have you been at Mad-rid 


Ma-drld 


I was then at Mi-lan 


Mil-an 


The continential people 


continen-tal 


In the la-b5r-atory laboratory lab-ber-ra-torr 


The regimental dlppo 


depot de-po 


That gives the impetus 


Impetus 


Bills have three days gratis 


grace 


Are you fond of herrins 


her-rings 


I'm choked with thust 


thirst thurst 


It behooved him to do it 


be-hove 


That's a very cirkitus way 


cir-cu-it-ous 


It fell right smack upon it 


with all its weight 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 73 

What rubbidge you talk rubbish 

What's a matter ? what's the matter 

Lov'd, fear'd. and honor'd* 

Out of the cestern cistern 

Sown with mustard and crease cress 

Do you allow a presentage? per centage 

That's a great addition to it improvement 

I write these few lines- { Wh { ** the m ™ 

I what he sees? 

This comes hoping- to find— Until death us do part — 
Remember me to all enquiring- friends — Yours in 
haste ; — these and similar expressions are gross vul- 
garisms, and should be avoided. 

It's ruckled up ruffled 

He carried me a pic-a-back on his back 

I took my father on my back 
And let him ride a-pig-a-pack. 

Comic Opera of Queen Dido, 
She's a dispizable wretch des-pi'cable 

there is no sort of talent so despisable. 

Sir W. Temple's Misc. p. 3 

Leave go let go, for let it ge 

Did you ever see a Chinee? Chinese 

* Never abbreviate words with an apostrophe in 
prose writing; it is a certain mark of ignorance* 



7± VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

Shawl, kuld, wuld, shuld; shall, could, would 

should; which are pronounced shal, kuud, 

wuud, shuud. 

Haive, air, ware; for have, are, were, which are 
pronounced hav, ar, wur 

Water decoct they fetch more cold than e're 
Was Scythian frost. — Did I complain you were (ware) 
Not serv'd with the same wine? — why see you have (aive 
Not the same water. — Some Getulian slave. IIol.Juv. 

Large as the fields themselves, and larger far 
Than civil codes with all their glosses are. 

Pope's Sat. 2,Z.95. 

Says he— At th' year's end, so much gold thou'lt have 
As for a conqueror, and, he shews, they crave. (aiv) 

H.J.s.S. 
Look thou no gross wrong do, to such as are (air) 
Valiaut and poor : for make them ne'er so bare. 

H. J. s. 8. 

That those ships pav'd the firm sea, which did bear 
Chariot wheels. — We believe deep rivers were (ware) 

H.J.s.10. 
Nor the Chaldean skill'd astrologer, 
Nor any secret ways, that lawful were, (wur) 

May's Luc. 

I dislike skollops scallops skal-lops 

PiU'shuent to the act pursuant per-soo-ant 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 75 

Pass-ed, oall-ed, ask-ed, esteem-ed, beseech-ed, 
f. judg-ed, striv-ed, pleas-ed, sacrific-ed 

This elongation of the ultimate is a gross and vul* 
gar method of reading- : it is used in the Church 
from a silly affectation of peculiarity, and in Cha- 
rity Schools from ignorance: but is wholly unjusti- 
fiable.— -Read as you speak, but speak correctly. 

It's incongrus nonsense in-con-gru-ous 

He tpak.£wo galloons galeons gal-yons 

A: yaller shawl yellow yello 

Parce that sentence parse parze* 

An irrevocable promise ir-rev-6cable 

The profficee was true prophecy proffe-sigh 

Great Phrebus way : or that the gods decree 
Made Cyrrha mute, thinking it prophetic 

May's Lac. 

He who to seem more deep than you or I 
Extols old bards, or Merlins' prophecy. — Pope. 

He has a sinnycure sinecure sigh-ne-cure 

I bought a razor strop strap 

Mixing up the letters v and u, and i and j, as the 
same letters, is a gross error among lexicographers, 

Syncope, or the contraction of words, in writing. 

such as he pass'd, he shew'd, he learn'd, exhibit de* 

fluency of education and should be avoided. 

f Latin j Pars Orationis. 



76 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 



He takes pressidence 
Is this your profyle? 
Give us a chaw 



pre-ce-dence 

profile profeel 

chew or quid 



Ah wretched queen ! yon range the pathless wood 
While on a flow'ry bank he chaws the cud. — Dryden. 

He is so full of kaypris caprice ker-prees 

After his aggrandisement ag-gran-dise-ment 

I took some blue-monge blanc-mange blorn-mornje 
He made no bones of it did it unhesitatingly 

I pull'd him up cited him by law 

He knows that fast enough— he'll do it fast enough— 
I'll take it fast enough— They'll go fast enough. 

Fast enough, is an adverbial expression, inelegantly, 
and improperly applied upon most occasions. 

He guv it me 

It was done gradjully 

People yoozyully do so 

They torment me perpetchally 

He was a complis 

Don't be afeard 

A troublesome hangnail 

I am chuckful 

A furse opponent 



gave 
grad u-ally 
u-su-ally 
per-pet-u-ally 
an accomplice 
afraid 
hagnail 
chokeful, a low expression 
for fierce, the stage 



Done into English 



translated 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 77 



Spain is a peninshula pen-in-su-la 

The race will come off next 1 n . , • , 

Tuesday* J come on ' or take placc 

Calves foot broth calf's foot 

I hate such carneyingf 

He drank it to the drags dregs 

She's. gone dead a tautological vulgarism 

An impudent urchint urchin 

He is administerator ad-min-is-tra-tor 

They were a-bed in bed 

Basellikun ointment ba-sil-i-con 

The bellygerant parties belligerant bel-lidg-erant 

Now he carries the cag he is offended 

His disorder is canker cancer 
These are shampillyons champignons sham-pinyons 

Quite chopfallen chap 

They use gon-do-lers gondola gondoler 

We had such a ker-rarnt corantj 

All garsconade gas-con-ade 

* This is a vulgarism of the editor of a sporting 
newspaper, who by the hysteron proteron, is as witty 
as a man, who should wish us good night at midday. 

f Notwithstanding the common use of this word, 
lexicographers have not yet noticed it. 

1 CoranTj a lively dance; the vulgarism is expressire 
of fun. 



?8 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRlEl*IES 



Use teepid water 

A fet-id smell 

That house is a bag--nio 

There are no assets 

Lend me the compasses 

I was properly maced 

He ko-al-leesd with him 

Firmis means the end 

It was a terrible ordeel 

The repertory of arts 

I was plantiff 

They paid the overplush 

The Ple-a-dees are in Taurus 

We got into a qu'ogmire 

He was a man of pro-ess 

He overpysed it 



tep-id 
fe-tid 
bagnio ban-yo 

assets 
compass 
cheated 
coalesced ko-al-lessd 
f I-n'is 
or-de-al 
rep-er-tory 
plain-tiff 
over-plus 
Pleiades Ply-a-dees 
quag-mire 
prow-ess prou 

over-poised 



Tanning", hiding, thrashing, wopping, basting, wal- 
loping, tipping, whacking, punching, serving out, 
drubbing, licking, dressing, giving goose, leather- 
ing; these low terms for beating exhibit the cor- 
ruptions that daily creep into language and deteri- 
orate its dignity. 
You're a complete do a vulgarism for cheat 

What are you in the suds about ? ill-humoured 
She slushed me all over sluiced sloosd 

He was thoroughly spiflicated confounded 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



70 



I took six for sequels 

Shew a light there 

He was fyaule$ over the coals 

I swopped it for? a hat^ 

The weather's muggy 

A cold collection 

The fault of govurment 

I'm a-dry 

In front a grass plat 

Gone to Hamberg 

At St. Petersburg* 

He gaye me a lectur 

How you've tumbled my dress 

Made from lithurage 

You've no gumption 

He's inexorable 

I've a game hand 

Use opodildoc 

He cant bear to see her out > « 



sequences 

bring 

called to account 

exchanged 

murky 

collation 

government guv-urn-ment 

thirsty 

plot 

Hamburgh Hamburrer 

Petersburg Peters-berg 

lecture lec-tshur 

Rumpled 

litharge 

wit, cunning 

in-ex-6rable 

hurt, crippled 

opodeldoc 



of his sight 
I do so ujzhally 
During his mayoraltry 
I didn't give a dite 
He likkidated the debt 
The debburty of the ward 



omit "to see'' 

u-su-ally 

mayoralty 

doit doyt 

liquidated lik-wi-dated 

dep-u-ty 



80 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

Full of enthusiism enthusiasm 

A rasher of bacon * 

Meux's intire entire 

The most e-quit-able equitable ekwi- table 

It was really hidjus hid-e-ous 

He made a lounge at me lunge 

Rising' six hands f 

I took some magneshee magnesia mag-neesh-er 

He entered into all the) . wn4t v .„ „, „ 

, > minutiae mi-nu-she-e 

minnooshee ) 

He had a lion upon the estate Ken le-un 

As liv one as the other as lieve X 

I gave such a sisserary § 

There wasjuch a piece j iUnatured tauntand dispute 

Y °% a o r ddnng ayS m ° U " } meddli ^ ^ ith kitch ™ affairs 

It gave me a world of trouble || 
We played up old gooseberry rare fun 

An irrepairable crime ir-rep-arable 

* Rasher is evidently a corruption of ration* 

f Rising is a stabulary preposition for about- 

J Lieve is now vulgar. 

§ Vulgarly applied to a smart knocking at the door, 

also to a quarrel of high words. 
[] Mare malorurn, a sea of troubles, is much better, the 

former is vulgar. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 81 

The harsp of the lock hasp h-asp 

I've not a scudduk no money 

Mop uses, browns, tizzies, tanners, bobs, bulls, 
blunt, are all blackguard terms for money and sui- 
table only for pickpockets. 

The honey tices it down entices 

A horrible miskreent mis-cre-ant 
In the last centyurry century cen-ter-ry 

The sturrup's too large stir-rup 

Where's the horsier ostler * 

Sunday is a holyday holy 

Monday is a holiday hol-Ie-da 

Come bundle, bolt, morris be off 

Ghost. Bold daring- printer, who disdain'st the law 
And tramplest under foot the will of kings ; 
Who writest North Britons, though the crown 

forbids it 
Wilt find, too soon will find, the harjy claw of 

Carrington. 
Bingley, beware ! and morris off like me. 

Court and City Mag. 1770. 

He needs must he has no alternative 

A loomy land loamy lo-my 

They flop their wings flap 

It was a garla night gala gay-ler 

Shew is better written show 

Ostler is probably derived from horse sadler. 



82 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

Mallifats are best marrowfats 

A matter of twenty quantity 

Cleaned with brigdust brick-dust 

I've split with him no longer friendly 

There's spit upon your hat spittle, saliva 

Near the risbun wristband 

That's all blatherumskite nonsense 

He has a whale on his hand weal weel 

Go to, go to —found so frequently in the earlier 
dramatists may tend to correct the improper writing 
of "too and fro," which implies "to that place, 
from this place." — Go to, appears therefore an un- 
complete expression, implying impatience, the sub- 
stantive of the preposition being suspended, as if 
one should say, go to the devil ; or, go to Bath ; the 
latter being adapted by polite people, from the as- 
sumption that it is the nearest road to the former. 

He knows the miss of it the loss or want 

You do me proud do me the honor 

I've made bold to call taken the liberty, 

That's only your seviration as-severation 

The frite was paid freight frajfee 

He was an orgzillary auxiliary orgz-il-yery 

It's quite optionable optional 

The Spartan Heelots Hel-ots 






OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 83 

A phaylanx of talent phalanx phal-anx 

The treble clif clef 

They are in partnerships partnership 

1 hate vacksillation vaccillation vassil-ation 

It's a component part coni-po-nent 

I have a grammar book grammar 

The paytronage is great patronage pat-ronage 

He needs must go there * 
Paul. Needs must you lay your heart at his dispose. 
K. John.. a. 1. s 1 
By the rout of Venice route root 

He was the tutorer tutor 

In the Alcoran in the Koran 

Religion is a technical thing delicate, serious 
I spoke of Boneypart Buonaparte Bonarpart 

Take some caraway comforts comfits 

I received a nonymus letter an anonymous 

He dispensed with three > devoured 

plates ot meat f ) 

It stands on trussels tressels 

Here's a poppet shew puppet 

In Paternoster row Pater Payter 

* The analysis of this obsolete phrase, although 
occasionally used by moderns defies all. the appliances 
of grammar. 

f Dispense, is to. do without. 



84 VULGARISMS AND IJVIPftO Pit £l TIES 

Great blundering is exhibited by unedu- 
cated persons in note writing, in which the 
words I, thou, we, you, upon the principles 
of grammatical propriety cannot appear : the 
following instances are illustrations of the 
errors jn question. 

Mr. A hopes Mr. B will excuse l ,. , . 

my chaise not being sent J* 

Mr. W's compliments to Mr. S") and will be obliged 
and I will be obliged if you > if he (Mr. S.) will 
will call to-morow. J call. 

Mr. and Mrs. H send their res- "1 „ A m . , ,„_ 
pects and we shall be happy } and wlU be ht W 

Mr.T presents his compliments") 

to Miss J. and it gives iner and has the pleasure 
pleasure to state ^ 

Mr.C. apologises to Mrs. F for \ , . 

not having sent my son before J 

John Price sends to enquire -\ 

after the health of Mr. > J. P. is very well 
Simms. I am very well j 

Mrs. Jay's compliments to) 

Mrs.jLove and I am vcryC and is sorry she cannot 

sorry I cannot come toC come to Mrs. L/s party 

your party. J 

Mr. Davis is obliged to Mr.-N 

Bury for the goose youi the goose he gent 

sent yesterday ) 



&F THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 85 



The following sentences incorporate a great 
variety of word* that are generally mispro- 
nounced and are brought together for or- 
thoepical practice. 

Satire and sophistry are the patron and matron of 
tergiversation: all the machinations of the Legate 
were premature and superfluous and exhibited a 
specimen of European contumacy apparently adapted 
to eradicate the mercantile and national industry. 

He was wounded by the formidable implements of 
ceremony, and the contiguous chasm into which he 
was inveigled formed at once the theatre of his mas- 
sacre and his sepulchre- 

The medicine he took for the ophthalmia and 
typhus rendered him paralytic and the lamentable 
news from Athens regarding the elecampane and 
the venison made the matter very ludicrous. 

The horizon of hereditary anticipation was to- 
wards China and an acceptable respite from Guild- 



86 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

hull was sufficiently opportune to render hiii? 
accessory to cognizance. Finally, to give accuracy 
to the exaggerated account of his obstreperous be- 
haviour, he sold his demesne rather than say apos- 
trophe or spell diphthong. 

Although he was philanthropic towards all, he was 
auxiliary to the chastisement which took place con- 
tiguous to a mountainous locality. 

During her widowhood she obtained a livelihood 
by the plebeian occupation of selling celery, endive, 
and lilac, a pursuit so contrary' to her peremptory 
character as to produce the most melancholy lamen- 
tation She was chagrined by the least refusal to 
her puerile disposition, and made the empyrean 
ring with her audacious discontent. 

He was attached to literature and ethics, and by 
means of an advertisement he entered into a contro- 
versy with an highlander -etrncerning his plaid and 
pronounciation ; and, in the altitude of his choler 
and the height of his enthusiasm, denominated him 
a plagiarist, a pedant, and a miscreant ; he said 
that his plagiarism, although extempore was irrele- 
vant, and was obtained from the economical fabric of 
his legends, through the presages of which he appa- 
rently construed his inherent and aerial traits of ab- 
surdity. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. &7 

She would not compromise the architecture of 
her character even for a ehrystal chariot and the 
planet Saturn, but put him in a schedule of quaran- 
tine for colleaguing by means -of placards ajralrfst 
her maintenance and her asparagus; and, for his in- 
terference in the carousals of her enjoyment. Thus 
she obtained simultaneous eclat and nonplussed him 
as effectually as if he were blasphemous and his 
religion zoology, 

It was perceptible that the valentine had produced 
a mischievous, indisputable, extraordinary and irre- 
parable effect: she was inexorable to courtesy, and 
environned as she was by fanatics and lunatics, she 
succumbed to the machinations of satirists, and to 
the flagrant orisons of her prompters. 

Isolated and impotent in the hands of ■such execu- 
tors, her thoughts were alienated from momentous 
and exemplary premises to desultory, despicable, and 
arbitrary considerations. Her finances were expend- 
ed on cresses, prunes, and geraniums: her ipse 
dixit upon monarchical and typographical subjects, 
was specific and incontrovertible. 

The cornice of the orchestra was oriental and by 
the advice of a committee she took out a patent for 
•a new shuttlecock and a stomachic medicine. 



88 VULGARISMS AND IMPROPRIETIES 

By a compulsory combat the grenadiers attacked 
the papists with bayonets, and it is still upon record 
that in a fit of perspiration and tremor she brought 
on her demise, and made her apotheosis to a subal- 
tern world upon the anniversary of her nativity. 

The plaintiff was indecorous and amenable to no 
conciliatory law, he importuned the debtor by the 
chicanery of the tribunals, and by inexorable au- 
dacity and unappeasable vituperation he attainted all 
the principles of humanity. 

He wa? a debauchee and a libertine, and thought 
to aggrandise his parentage by a mausoleum erected 
to propitiate their manes and in reminiscence of the 
pageantry and fastuosity which had long reverber- 
ated along the banks of the Euphrates and the en- 
virons of the Archipelago. 

The belligerent parties -were of Herculean 
force and sufficient to annihilate the allies whose 
supernumerary adherents gave an impetus to their 
actions which gave poignant chagrin to the policy of 
the seraglio. 

A grievous caprice renders him an inexplicable 
chimera and a precedence in the presidency substan- 
tiates his irrevocable edicts and his equivocal man- 
dates. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 89 

*Tepid water was temporarily recommended, and 
the fetid medicine was ordered, as corollary to that 
miscellany of admixtures, which the veterinary prac- 
titioner had adopted as a refrigeratory to the febrile 
influences. 

The vase which was discovered near the Cataract 
had been left there by the incendiaries, who after 
firing the granary made a syllabub and, by a circuit- 
ous route went off in a southern direction, with tlte 
assets contained in the reticule of the viscountess. 



MMkYmkL BMPROPiRJlETIfEl 

OF THE 

ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



As the Grammatical improprieties of speed* 
may be accounted as part and parcel of the po- 
pular vulgarisms, some of the most common are 
here brought together; and as they are intended 
for those persons who do not comprehend gram- 
matical arrangement, they are not placed under 
the heads of canons, to obviate a consideration of 
that which would not be intelligible. 

It might have fell there 
fallen 

If he had teached her 
taught 

I've gave away fourteen 
given 

Not by no means 
any 

1 were about to ask you 
jWts 



It warnt me 
was not I 

That board is six foot long 
feet 

Give me that dice 
die 

He tcld the tother man 
other 

Give me a book whats got 
pictures. that ba* 



02 



GRAMMATICAL IMPROPRIETIES 



I'd have made her done it 
do 

He haves them all at home 
has 

There arn't none left 
are not any 

This is most hardest 
hard 

You are more harsher 
harsh 

You are sure to miss of him 
miss hi in 

Why dont you take & do it? 
omit take & 

They had just set down 
sat 

What signifies their opi- 
signify nions 

I was awoke by the bell 
awaked 

There is nine of us in the 
are house 

She bore him a child 
bare 

When I met him he was 
drank— drunk 

"Our pleasures leads us away 
lead 

1 ought to have went there 
gOH^e 



It was showed me 

shown 
Follv and ignorance is the 
evils of life are 

He had laid down 
lain 

The sheep was all sold 
were 

The Parliament are assem- 
bled is 

I always tells him that 
tell 

Wine and cake is good 
are 

I knows it well 
know 

I eats hearty 
eat heartily 

They never takes no notice 
take any 

The cat catched a rat 
caught 

They was ill and lied down 

were lay 

He bare the weight on his 
bore shoulders 

The price of bread has fell 
fallen 

Neither of them arc dead 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



I speak frank 
frankly 

I intend for to go 

omit for 
I speak plain 

plainly 

I speak intelligible 
intelligibly 

Leave me alone by myself 
by myself, is here unnecessary 

I don't never wear it 
omit don't 

Our father which art in 
heaven who 

Who is here? Ans. Me 
I 

She would have gave him 
some given 

1 he books was sold for too 
were Tittle 

The bears flew from the 
dogs fled 

I never knowed it before 

k new- 
Bo th John and his wife is 

offended are 

I see him yesterday in Hoi- 

saw born 

The crowd were outrageous 

was 



The parliament are deter- 
mined is 

It was me that struck him 
I who 

We begun the work y ester- 
began day 

Every one of them are good 
is 

He did him a honour 
an 

He behaves in an humble 
manner a 

He went for to do it 
omit for 

He was frightened by a owl 
an 

The crew were saved 
was 

She has'ntgot none 
she has none 

She catched the disorder 
caught 

Never do so no more 

any 
Unless he goe3 

go 

If he repents 

repeut 

He was a going 



u 



GRAMMATICAL IMPROPRIETIES 



We mustn't do it 
must not 

I am twelve years old to- 
shall be morrow 

I was laying on the bed 

lying- 
She lias just went' out 
gone 

He was born on their shonl- 
borne ders 

I have knowed that a long 
known time 

The birds had flew 
flown 

The river was froze 
frozen 

The trees had fell into the 
river fallen 

A man what lives there 
who 

The embankment give way 
gave 

She was frost bit 
bitten 

I was awoke by it 
awaked 

He was bade to do it 

bitiden 

She teached the Latin 
taught 



They were agen the war 
against 

The sheep was she; red 
shorn 

Thomas see him this mor* 
saw ning* 

The ship was laded 
laden 

The grass was mowed 
mown 

You are taller than me 
I 

If it is so 
be 

Although he is there 
be 

Will you take a egg 

an 

I saw him t'other day 
the other 

Wealth or power are good 



He was a running 
ornit a 

Fne nation patronise Vrm 
patronises 

The government rule 

rules 
The public are wrong 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE 



95 



lie bridge is broke 
broken 
<ook at this here 

omit here 
ve me that there book 

omit there 
[ done it often 
did 

lie horse was shood 
shod 

Hfe were walking with me 
was 

fie looks exceeding- well 
exceedingly 

tie and me went out yester- 
1 day 

Vhat cares I 
care 

Almost every one are ill 

is 
1 wishes you well 

wish 

My husband come home yes- 
terday came 

He was took to prison 

taken 

He lied down 
lay 



He swum across the river 
swam 

They was all very well 
were 

When I see them last 

saw 

Twice five is ten 
are 

I aint got not a morsel 
I have not 

1 was properly did 

done 

He was almost froze 
frozen 
Each of them are good 

Every one are sold 
is 

Neither of them are gone 

is 

All is subject to death 
are 

The goods was bought 

were 
It must not lav dormant 
lie' 

He rose the rent 
aised 



The surgeon binded up his He has lesser than John 



bound 



less 



96 



GRAMMATICAL IMPROPRIETIES 



The river was over flown 
flowed 

They were slew 
slain 

He was riz then 
risen 

They seeked every where 

sought 
It was shook to pieces 

shaken 

The horse was rid to death 
ridden 

It was done fair 
fairly 

He out growed his strength 
out grew 

It was took in a net 
taken 

I teached him myself 
taught 

The cock had crown 
crowed 

The stockings were knitted 
knit 

The fields are mowed 
mown 

The stone was wore away 
worn 

She wringed out the linen 



We have wrote the letters 
written 

She sticked the pin into me 
stuck 

None of you cant open the 
door can 

The dog was stole away 
stolen 

He throwed him down 
threw 

The apple was took away 
taken 

Henry has fell down 
fallen 

The bird has forsook her 
nest forsaken 

I nave gave it to her 
given 

His head was clove in two 
cloven 

She was catched out 
caught 

The candle was blew out 
blown 

The mice was took 
were taken 

The scissors cut smooth 
smoothly 

Never calumniate nobody 
anybody 



. 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



97 



He never goes nowhere 
any where 

She does'nt give me nothing 
she gives 

Who done this ? 
did 

Although he does it 
do 

Unless he is changed 
be 

If I was certain of it 
were 

Whether it is him or her 
be he she 

Would to god that it was so 
were 

Was I sure of the fact 
were 

You must come to I 
me 

The man to who I spoke 
whom 

Of who did you buy it ? 
whom 

The man what I saw 
whom 

The people what's got mo- 
ney who have 

I am the man who rules you 
rule 



The doctors is all gone 
are 

Age and honesty claims res- 
pect claim 

None of them stop here 
stops 

The parliament are dissolved 

is 
The ho use of commons were 
refractory was 

He done it hisself 
did himself 

From hence he imagined 
omit from 

They were drove to it 
driven 

He runned away from me 
ran 

She is wanted particular 
particularly wanted 

He lost a eye and a arm 

an an 

I an't a going home 
I am not going 

The wind blowed it 
blew 

Who did he go off with ? 
with whom omit with 

Where shall he go off from? 
whence omit oft' fiom 



98 



GRAMMATICAL IMPROPRIETIES 



Who shall I copy off of? 
from whom shall omit off of 

Cover the meat over 

omit over 

He is interested as well as me 
I 

He lav lustily about him 
laid 

Is it not I you quarrel with? 
ine 

Who said so? me 

I 

Give me them things 
those 

I was laying down 

lying- 
He lied on the ground 
lay 

That coat's hizen 
coat is his 

Get them there snuffers 
those 

Bring them hare patterns 

those 

Let me set there 
sit 

Sit it down in the bill 
set 

The author of a many works 
of many 



I He lay the money down 
laid 

If you do do it 
if you do it 

He was runned over 
run 

They warn't there 
were not 

I daresent give it 

dare not 
It was all weared away 
worn 

That's the man as I saw 

whom 

This is the stick as I had 

which 
Had I have heard before ? 
omit have 

Had he have known it ? 
omit have 

Here's a man what's eighty 
years old who is 

Who with ? 
th whom? 

He's always agin me 
against 

Who to ? 
to whom ? 

Who did you fight with? 
with whom omit with 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 



99 



I am going- to-morrow 
shall go 

He lives opposite me 
opposite to 

The book as I read 
which 

Who did you go to? 
to whom omit to 

He dqnt know 
Hoes not 

I hates all them as don't 

hate who do not 

She need'nt do it 
needs not 

I smuggd it 
smuggled 

You're offending of her 
omit of 

lfthoubeestthesonofGod? 
be 

He rose the rent 

raised 

Who should Ifind there but 
whom George 

Who ought I to want ? 
whom 

Who do you wish for? 
for whom omit for 

Who did he catch? 
whom 



She is the best of the two 
better 

Agreeable to his word 

agreeably 
She prevented him from 

doing s* omit from 

In a far more superior way 

omit more 

Whether or no 

not 

We lay no stress upon that 
laid 

It benefited neither you or I 
nor me 

Are neither of them the 
is right one ? 

No more shall you Sir 
nor shall 

You will get laughed at 
be 

He rid the horse 
rode 

I was properly did 
done 

The ship was loaded 
laden 

He lit the candles 
lighted 

It a"int finished 
it is not 



wo 



GRAMMATICAL IMPROPRIETIES 



How many is there? 
are 

It is not you or me 
nor I 

I'll do it against next week 
by 

You are not so fat as me 
I am 

Let us be they 

them 

Let me be he 
him 

I thought it to be he 
him 

He gave it for to pay the 
bill omit for 

1 very near fell 
nearly 

Which be they ? 
are 

Will you do it or no? 
not 

It stank in his nostrils 
stunk 

Had I have done it 
omit have 

Had I have taken it 
. omit have 

Had I have not thought so 
omit have 



Had I have understood 
omit have 

It snew fast 
snowed 

Had I have wished 
omit have 

He is subject to the headach 
subjected 

I am a man which am a jew 
who 

The greatest of difficulties 
omit of 

Men such as him 
he 

Was I sure of it 
were 

There is but five 
are 

There isn't none 
are 

Well says I, so says he 
said said 

I does it often 
do 

He done it yesterday 
did 

What are you doing on ? 

omit or 
It lays dormant 
lies 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. 101 

Bishopsgate and Aldgate is ancient entrances 
are 

I never see him not before now 
saw omit not and nejw 

Neither his father nor mother were mistook 
was mistaken 

The enemy retired from their works -* 
his 

My father and me intend:? going- to France 
I intend to go 

That was the man that did it 
who 

That is the dog whose master is so great a hunter 
the master of which 

The child went with he and she 
him her 

On the first of June next I shall be here three years 
have been 

Some of 'em doesn't know nothing 
them know nothing- 

I found him particular obliging 
particularly 

If he was able I know he would 
were 

Perseverance and industry overcomes difficulties 
overcome 

Repentance and amendment is profitable to mankind 
are 

That's that horse's master 

the master of that horse 



102 GRAMMATICAL IMPROPRIETIES 

That's her husband's sister's child 

that's the child of the sister of her husband 
My boy's father's cart 

the cart of the father of my boy 
I am the person who complains 
complain 
Neither passion nor fury avail 
avails 

Avarice and penury represses every good sentiment 
repress 

Neither respect nor submission produce any effect 
produces 

A house, a cart, and a table is inanimate 
are 

Every man and every woman are born 
is 

Either this party or that fall 
falls 

What a quantity of persons there are 
is 

From hence he pursued his journey 
omit from 

From thence he determined upon his future conduct 
omit from 

He has not signed it nor will not 
he 

I don't know so well a bred man 
well bred a man 

He depended upon her more than he 
him 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE, 103 



That is a dog of the butchers landlord's 
landlord 

That is a field of the squire's father's 
father 

That is a house of my father's tenant's 
tenant 

In future may we have more of order 

more order 
In a month we shall have one of the finest of armies 

finest armies 

Him and me was playing" 
he I were 

Has any one a knife in their pocket 
his 

The time was spent in mutual examining 
mutually 

One of the best books there are 
is 

What a quantity of ships there are 
is 

I should not have stopped while evening- but for having 
been detained until 

He looked at me very steadfast 
steadfastly 

I never rode so ill a going* horse 
ill-going- a horse 

You can do it just as well as me 
I can 

As if him or any man had a right to meddle 

he 



104 GRAMMATICAL IMPROPRIETIES 

Your having" done so renders the matter more difficult 

you 

Where neither frivolity nor selfishness have existence 

has 

It is you who makes him ridiculous 
make 

Adjoining that of the queen's 
queen 

By the king's ordering 

king- 
Any person may have it at their convenience 
his 

He was made a cats-paw of 

omit of 

He is more precise than them 
they 

She is in all respects better than him 
he is 

He is more intellectual than them 

they are 

You think him more virtuous than I am 
than me 

You were persuaded mare by her than they 

them 

I never saw so ill a painted picture 
ill-painted a picture 

He had an opportunity ef seeing of it 
omit of 

Tbe opinions of the wisest of men 
omit of 



OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. lOo 

You eat what you ought not to 

to eat 

The first person he addressed himself to 
person to whom he omit to 

Wisdom and gold is granted unto thee 
are 

I hav'nt saw him this week 
have not seen 

The man says to rae ; be off says he, so says I, I sharnt 
said said said 

says I, so says he 
said said 

What is the price of a marble slab whose length is 
10 foot the length of which 

feet 

1 would not have any thing* that looks like enmity 
between you and I 
me 

The Blenheim man of war took all her guns on board 
ship its 



-^.~ 



106 



TAUTOLOGICAL PHRASES. 



Amongst the improprieties of language the 
use of more words than the sense requires 
should be carefully avoided; these are de- 
nominated pleonasms. — The repetition of the 
same word is called tautology as "she screamed 
a scream" the absurdity of which is self 
evident. 

The words printed in Italics in the following' sea- 
fences are redundant and in speaking and writing- 
should be omitted. 

He returned back ten guineas 

He soon returned back again 

The constitution is founded on ^foundation 

He's an ancient old fellow 

The first original of the drama 

They live in such an out of the way way 

He is very insinuating in his manners 



TAUTOLOGICAL PHRASES. 1Q7 

At the Jirst beginning 

It projects out too much 

I consulted him about my pecuniary finances 

Be good enough to cover it over 

She erased it out 

He's quite a young youth 

She again gained a prize 

If in case we go 

I will not do it at all 

I have no time on my hands 

He gave him a kick with his/oof 

Those very words came from his mouth 

The particles mutually adhere together 

A great distance off 

He fell down on the ground 

She lifted it up 

Will you though ? 

I won't now 

They stuck close together 

He won't admit you in 

Under the present existing circumstance* 

You must put down the burning incendiaries 

She cried all the whole day long 

He shall offer it of his own voluntary will 

To cause thee to hear it with thy ears 

I always look prospectively forward 



108 TAUTOLOGICAL PHRASES 

Well then you may take the other alternative 

She has a little baby 

Quite a young infant 

I talked to him for some time in conversation 

He is gone to combat iviih the French 

To him the blame is imputed to 

It was restored back 

Go o^from the ground 

Take it off of the dish 

£7 17s. Qd. sterling 

Of 4:1b. 4oz. weight each 

The whole universal world 

The latter end of his life 

The line terminated at the end with a hook 

Save Jesus only 

And I only am escaped alone to tell 

Their own reciprocal embroilments 

It is incorporated in the body of the work 

Turn the wheel round 

He filled it too full 

The gold usually made use of 

They mutually complimented each other 

We both met accordingly 

He went the next week after 

The first time 1 ever heard of that before 

We entered in the room 



TAUTOLOGICAL PHRVSES. 109 

She fell down on the floor 
I saw it with my eyes 
He was exalted up to the skies 
She was cut all down the face 
We arrived together at the same time 
You struck him right over the head 
It was an idea of the mind 
The place was undermined 
The downfall of Rome 
Afflicted with the yellow jaundice 
You are not any the forwarder 
That is an unknown secret 
Put it separately by itself 
It is a true and real fact 
Two single old maids 
It wss plated with silver 
They are connected one with another 
Where in the world is he \ 
Such pretty pictures you don't know 
He knocked it right off 
The moon hangs suspended in the air 
She followed behind the party 
He borrowed the loan of the book 
A circuitous way round 
That does not follow as a sequitur 
Notwithstanding' the night we ddvancex] forward 



1 10 TAUTOLOGICAL PHRASES. 

He vanished out of sight 

They were terrified and affrighted 

He recovered his illness 

I went to a concert of music 

He required auxiliary aid 

First of all, last of all, most of all 

They talked together for an hour 

They loved each other mutually 

He has done it for these several year* 

He's a native born 

1 know a friend of mine 

James and Robert are tivo twins 

Both you two must go 

We had ocular demonstration before our eyes 

A part of the Alkoran 

They were united together 

He prevented him from doing- it 

I took to taking snuff two years ago 

I did not go out all day long 

Two strokes which General Washington soon 

after struck 
Thither winged with speed a numerous brigade 

hastened 
Not yet awhile 
Take either one 
He was raised up in life 



TAUTOLOGICAL PHRASES. Hi 

They went down to the bottom 
We moved slowly on 
The dinner was served up 
*fo all except him alone 
We followed in pursuit 
The houses fell down 
He retired gently backwards 
She is all alone by herself 
There is no other alternative 
He is a single unmarried man 
We reiterated it repeatedly 
It is returned again to the sea 
The interior was gilt with gold 
He cut it in two halves 
She was surrounded by a circle of friends 
He collected the whole army together 
It was wmoosed 
In order to be foloved 
You are a London cockney 
There is an open aperture 
It is sufficiently high enough 
They repeated it over again 
It stood perpendicularly upright 
Give a small trifle sir 
I saw a little dwarf 



112 TAUTOLOGICAL PHRASES. 

It is not above two months ago since he left 

Some rays of light are inflected inwards 

She dreamt such a dream 

It was propelled forward 

A single individual person 

I mentioned it to you in conversation 

How do you do ? 

I am very, well in health 

He threw the ball up in the air 

She is deranged in her intellects 

The sun shines so bright 

I will engrave the engraving 

She is very well herself 

On what do you do it on 



113 



The following list contains a number of 
words having the same orthography, but 
which for the purpose of implying a different 
sense change the accentuation. To those who 
would read and speak well, a particular atten- 
tion to them is of importance. 



absent 


absent 


concord 


concord 


abstract 


abstract 


c5ncrete 


concrete 


accent 


accent 


conduct 


conduct 


advertise- "1 
ment J 


advertise 


conference 
confine 


confer 
confine 


affix 


affix 


conflict 


conflict 


attribute 


attribute 


cSnjure 


conjure 


augment 


augment 


consort 


consort 


august 


august, adj. 


cdnserve 


conserve 


blasphemy 


blaspheme 


consult 


consult 


chastisement chastise 


cdntest 


contest 


collect 


collect 


contract 


contract 


colleague 


colleague 


converse 


converge 


comment 


comment 


convert 


convert 


eompact 


compact 


convict 


convict 


compound 


compound 


convey 


convey 


concert 


concert 


descant 


descent 



114 



desert 


desert 


po-lish, adj 


pol-ish 


dfgest 


digest 


precedent 


precede 


envelope 


envelope 


prefix 


prefix 


environ 


environ 


premises 


premise 


escort 


escort 


present 


present 


essay 


essay 


president 


preside 


exempt 


exempt 


produce 


produce 


exile 


exile 


project 


project 


export 


export 


protest 


protest 


extract 


extract 


put (as but 


put (as foot) 


ferment 


ferment 


rebel . 


rebel 


frequent adj. frequent 


record 


record 


gallant adj. gallant s. 


refuse 


refuse 


Import 


import 


subject 


subject 


insult 


insult" 


survey 


survey 


Invalid 


invalid, adj. 


tSrment 


torment 


minute 


minute, adj. 


transfer 


transfer 


object 


object 


transport 


transport 


perfume 


perfume 


unit 


unite 


permit 


permit 


use 


use (uze) 



115 



ASPIRATION OF H. 



Some writers have excluded h from being 
a letter at all: others in imitation of the 
Greeks have determined it to be only an as- 
pirate — Whether this question will ever be 
settled or how long it will entertain dispute it 
is impossible to foresee — about a century and 
a half ago when an invariably preceded it 
we find in an old grammar 

"H,tho' deny'd a letter heretofore, 
We justly to the alphabet restore. 

As we see no necessity for its use in many 
cases and no authority for its disuse in others, 
we recommend a sole regard to euphony a a 
the guide, and conclude with the following 
recommendation. 

Let h no colloquy debar 

Let future trifling cease 

The stage, the pulpit, and the bar 

May use it as they please. 



Readings in which an precedes the letter H. 



An habiliment of scarlet 
An habitual thing 
An habitually pursued cus- 
tom 



Deluded by an hallucination 
He made an harangue' 
An harmonical sound 
An harmonious melody 



116 



ASPIRATION OF K. 



An harmoniously arranged 

meeting 
An hebdomadal i 
Anhebdoinadary} account 
An heir and an heiress 
An heirless father 
The estate is an heirship 
An heliacal calculation 
A n heliocentric observation 
An hemispherical section 
He has an hemorrhage 
An hepatical disease 
An heptarchical division 
An herb of much virtue 
An herbaceous meadow 
An herbage wholesome and 

flourishing 
Have you an herbal 
He is an herbalist 
An herby taste 
An hereditable revenue 
An hereditament in rever- 
sion 
An hereditary claim 
An heretical creed 



It fell to him as an heritage 

Concerning an heim aphro- 
dite 
An hermetic operation 

An hermeticallv sealed bot- 
tle 
He lives like an hermit 
There is an hermitage 
Secluded as an herraitess 
An heroical act 
An heroically maintained 

battle 
She behaved like an heroine 
There was an heroism 

about him 
An herpetieal eruption 
There was an hesitatio* 
An heteroclite noun 
An heterodox opinion 
An heterogeneal family 
Of an heterogeneous kini 
Of an hexagon shape 
An hpxagonal figure 
An hexameter verse 
An hiation seized us 
Au hiatus is unavoidable 



ASPIRATION Of M. 



117 



An hibernal cough 
An hierarch is the chief 
An hierarchy is priestly 
An hieroglyphic is a sign 
An hieroglyphical emblem 
We possessed an hilarity 
It is an hinderance to us 
Hume is an historian 
An historical fact 
An historically staled fact 

Smollet is an historiogra- 
pher 
An histrionic performance 
An hodiernal account 
An homage to the King 
An homogeneous principle 
An homonymous term 
An homofonous quantity 
An honest man 

An .honestly determined 
matter 

An honesty highly praise- 
worthy 

It was an honour 
An honourably contested 
argument 



An honorable man 
An horal indicator 
An horary circle 
An horizon terminates 
An horizontal wheel 
A clock is an horologe 
He projected an horoscope 
An horrific detail 
He made an hortation 
An hortative discourse 
He is an hosier 
An hospitable family 
He went to an hospital 
An hospitality unbounded 
Received an hostage 
An hostile meeting 
An hostility insuperable 
An hostler at the inn 
An hourglass is wanted 
An hourly expectation 
An humble behaviour 
An humbly beseeching- 
prayer 
He was an hussar 
Send me an hyacinth 



118 



ASPIRATION OF H. 



An hyaline or crystalline 
An hydraulical instrument 
An hydrocephalus humour 
An hydrometer is used 
An hydropical disorder 
An hydrostatical engine 
An hymeneal ceremony 
By an hypallage 
An hyperbolical compli- 
ment 



What is an hyperbole? 
An hyperborean blast 
An hypnotic medicament 
An hypocrisy unpardonable 
An hypocritical meanness 
Relative to an hypostasis 
An hypostatical union 
Pounded on an hypothesis 
An hypothetical argument 
An hysterical affection 



That an was indiscriminately used may be seen 
by the following references: 



An haughty bear, Spect76. 
An hundred, ib. 

An habit, ib. 79. 

An high place, Rob. India, 

sec. 2. 
An history in dialogue, ib. 

app. 
An healing, Gibbon, D. & 

F 12 3. 
An hero, ib. \2, 353. 
An hostile people, ib, 10, 

137. 
An holy life, ib. 243. 
An hasty decline, ib. 245, 
An horse, ib. 2, 403. 



So might an hand, Wott* 

on Learn, p. 2, 94. 
An humble, Gibb. D. & F. 

2, 407. 
Not so much perdition as 

an hair, Temp. a. I , s. 5 

In the Bible, an stands be- 
fore every word beginning 
witb h and in other works of 
a century back it may be 
found similarly placed, as the 
above examples illustrate* 



INDEX. 



Abate . .. 18 

Abdomen 38 

Abed 77 

Abominable 45 

Accelerated ...... 47 

Accept 71 

Acceptable 8 

Accessary 8 

Accident 40 

Accommodation .. 62 

A ccomplice 76 

Accordingly .... 30 

Accuracy 8 

Achebone 64 

Aches 35 

Acme 57 

Actor 12 

Acute 51 

Addition 73 

Adherent 69 

Administrator .... 77 

Admiralty ...... 8 

Advantage 34 

Adversary 59 

Advertise 25 

Advertisement .. 31 

Aerial 26 

Afraid,,., 16,58,76 



After 59 

Again 10,67 

Against 44 

Aggrandisement . 76 

Aisle 59 

Ajar 60 

Alienated .... 45, 49 

Alleviated 65 

Allies 59 

Almonry 64 

Almost 36 

Alternate 51 

Alternately ...... 43 

Altitude 4, 24 

Ameliorated .... 55 

Amenable 59 

Amputated 53 

Anatomised 10 

Anatomy 20 

Ancients 54 

Anecdotes 68 

Animation 48 

Annihilated 58 

Anniversary .... 42 

Anointed 23 

Anonymous .... 83 

Ante 25 

Antipodes ...... 45 



120 



Apostles 46 

Apothecary 40 

Apostrophe 16 

Apotheosis 42 

Apparent .... 10, 27 

Applicable 45 

Apprentice 64 

Apricots 54 

Apron 67 

Aquafortis 54 

Arabic 62 

Arbitrary 45 

Archipelago 55 

Architecture .... 26 

Archives 54 

Area 9 

Argues 15 

Arsenal 68 

As .44 

Ask 69 

Asked 4 

Asks 28 

Asparagus 22 

Aspect 21 

Assets 78 

Asseveration .... 82 

Assizes 61 

Assortment 66 

Astraddle 13 

At 47 

Athens 14 

Attack 61 

Attacked .... 29, 37 



Attainted 51 

Avenue 47 

Audacious 22 

Audacity 47, 68 

Aught 59 

August 69 

Aunt 34 

Auxiliary 82 

Awkward 50 

Baby 42 

Bachelor 15 

Bade 57 

Baffled 10 

Bagnio 78 

Bailiff 33 

Balusters 54 

Banbury 68 

Baronet 66 

Basilicon 77 

Basting 10 

Bayonet 44 

Be" 22 

Bear 69 

Beasts 40 

Beat 59, 62 

Beaten 67 

Beatiner 49 

Beatitude 60 

Beetle 38 

Before 59 

Behove 72 

Bellerophou .... 51 

Belligerent , . 77 



121 



Bellows 63 

Benumbed 48 

Berkshire 11 

Berwick 66 

Bestial ... 32 

Betrothed 51 

Better 62 

Bile 4 

Biography 58 

Birmingham .... 17 

Blab 27 

Biackmoor 23 

Blancmange .... 76 

Blasphemous .... 20 

Blessed /0 

Boil 3,57 

Boiling 11 

Boisterous 53 

Bold 82 

Bole ammonia. .. . 3 

Bologna 54 

Bona fide 59 

Bon citoyen 51 

Bones 76 

Bosom ........ 38 

Both 34 

Bowels 53 

Bowl 11 

Bowler 7 

Braees ... 10 

Bran ... .„ 41 

Breeches . . . 26 

©rick dust 82 



Brigand 55 

Bristles 51 

Brocoli 55 

Broiled 49 

Burgundy 7 

Burial ..'.... 25, 70 

Burnt 3 

Burst 10, 41 

Cetera ....... 8 

Calculated 33 

Calf 23 77 

Call 29 

Calrary . . 56 

Cancer' ........ 77 

Canonization .... 5*2 

Capacity .-,...,.-. 68 

Caprice 76 

Care 70 

Carrion 7 

Carneying 77 

Carousal 33 

Cataract 68 

Catastrophe 44 

Catch 12, 61 

Catherine 69 

Caught 10,70 

Cauterised 57 

Cautious 50 

Celery 20 

Cedent 37 

Century .. 51 

Ceremony 6 

Certainly .... 22, 57 



122 



Chagrin 25 

Chair 4 

Chaise 7, 15, 55 

Chaldron 47 

Champignons .... 77 

Chandelier 44 

Changed 72 

Chaos 9 

Chapped 29 

Chaps 17,77 

Charing 23 

Chariot 28 

Charter 12 

Charwoman .... 27 

Chasm 12 

Chastisement .... 7 

Cheated 78 

Cheesecake 63 

Cherub 8 

Chess 13 

Chew 76 

Chicanery 57 

Chicken 42 

Chimera 55 

Chimney ........ 15 

China 16 

China aster 36 

Chinese 73 

Chirped 17 

Choir 7,60 

Chokeful 76 

Choleric 47 

Christians 53 



Chucked 23 

Churl 12 

Chyle 4 

Cieling 33 

Circuitous 72 

Circulation 59 

Circumstance . . 33, 43 

Cistern 73 

Cited 76 

Citoyen 51 

Clandestine .... 45 

Cleanly 31 

Clef 83 

Clergy 4i 

Clerk 35 

Climacteric 44 

Climbed 10 

Coadjutor 41 

Coalesced 78 

Coalition 62 

Cochineal 18 

Cock 30 

Codicil 48 

Cognizance ...... 8 

Com 36 

Collation 79 

Col leaguing .. 20 

Combat 44 

Comfits 83 

Comical 64 

Commenting .... 12 

Committee 41 

Commonalty .... 7 



123 



Compass 78 

Component 83 

Compromise .... 27 

Compulsory .... 46 

Concern 3 

Concert 21 

Conciliatory . . . . 53 

Concourse 14 

Concurred 51 

Conduct 4 

Conjecture 41 

Consistory 39 

Consols " 60 

Consort ........ 51 

Conspicuous .... 58 

Conspiracy 32 

Construe 27 

Contact 49 

Contemptuous. ... 44 

Contiguous . . 16, 17 

Continental 72 

Contrary 19 

Contrast 31 

Controversy .... 31 

Contumacy 14 

Conversant 8 

Convulsed 72 

Convulsive 64 

Cope 59 

Coral 12 

Corant 77 

Cordial 53 

Cornice >. 37 



Corollary 71 

Coroner 51 

Coronation .... 34 

Corps 30 

Cos 35 

Cotemporary .... 53 

Covent 4 

Cover 15 

Covetous 71 

Courier 33 

Courtesy .... i3, 38 
Creature 4 

C= edible .. 13 

Cresses 44 

Cress 73 

Crowding 17 

Croydoir. ..... 20 

Crushed .. .. . 23 

Crystal /. 31 

Cucumber . . .. 
Curiosity ,..,., 
Currants , , . 1.0, 16 
Cursed 

Cursorily 66 

Cutlass 4 

Dare 60 

Darling 38 

Daughter 16 

Daunted 70 

Debauchee /I 

Debut 33 

Decisive 13 

Deep 49 



121 



Degrade 51 

Demesne 13 

Demise 48 

Deposed CO 

Depot 72 

Deputy 79 

Derhv 11 

Deserved.. ...... 15 

Design 7 

Despicable.. .. 43, 73 

Desultory 40 

Deteriorated .... 47 

Determined .... 47 

Devoured .S3 

Dew 37 

Diameter 64 

Diamond 3 

Dictionary ....... 60 

Diphthong- 12 

Disadvantageous 49 

Disappointed .... 33 

Dislocated 48 

Distich 13 

Distraint 53 

Docile 70 

Do 45 

Doit . 79 

Dome 21 

Done 70 

Dover ...... 68 

Doubtful 17 

.Draught 14 

Drawer.: ....,.., 70 



Drawing- . , . 14 

Dregs 62, 77 

Drew 64 

Drove 23, 33 

Drought 62 

Drown 33 

Dubious 16 

Duplicate 72 

Dynasty 59 

Dv sentry 56 

Early ." 72 

Earned 68 

Earnest 7 

Eating 29, 37 

Echo 53 

Eclat 30 

Economic SO 

Edge 23 

Educated 29, 31 

E'en 50 

Effectually 20 

Effluvium' 3 

Egg 33 

Egotist 41 

Either 18, 69 

Elecampane 17 

Electuary 57 

Elegiac 64 

Eligible 59 

Elm 34 

Else 15 

Emaciated 67 

Embroidered .... 53 



125 



Embroil 71 

Employment .... 63 

Empty 3, 50 

Empyrean 30 

Encore 13 

Endive 4 

Enervated 57 

Engines 38 

Engrosses 49 

Enigma 48 

Enjoys 70 

Enlisted 31 

Ensuring 28 

Entangled 70 

Enthusiasm 34 

Enticed 21 

Entire 80 

Envelope 9 

Environned .... 43 

Environs 62 

Epoch 69 

Epaulettes 40 

Epitome 25 

Equitable 30 

Equivocate 66 

Ere 50 

Errand 9 

Eructate 28 

Esplenade 68 

Esquire 11 

Et cjetera 8, 5S 

Ethics 24 



Eulogium 65 

Euphrates 61 

European 14 

Events 54 

Ev'n 50 

Ewe 69 

Exaggerated .... 7 

Excoriated 66 

Excursion 58 

Executor 48 

Exemplary 45 

Exhibition 33 

Exquisite 66 

Extempore 29 

Extolled 32 

Extraordinary . . 38 

Fabric 28 

Failure 43 

Falconer 66 

Falmouth 49 

Familiar 62 

Fanatics 45 

Fantastical 13 

Far 24 

Farina 37 

Farthing 4 

Fast 70, 76 

Favours 61 

Fraid 52 

Fear 16 

Features 26 

February 12 

Fermented ...... 39 



126 



Fetched 6, 51 

Fetid 78 

Fierce 76 

Fifth 11 

Finances 41 

Finis . ; 78 

Firmament 66 

First 66 

Fixtures 28 

Flagrant 44 

Flambeaux 69 

Flannel 32 

Flap 81 

Fioor 51 

Formidable 5 

Fortuitously .... 69 

Fortune 65 

Forward 59 

Fought 28, 67 

Foundling 30 

Fracas 50 

Franchise 31 

Free 28 

Freight 82 

Frenetic 47 

Frequenter 70 

Frequents 40 

Full to 52 

Fumigated 52 

Furredged ...... 66 

Further 50 

Fuss 55 



Future 29 

Gala 81 

Galleon 75 

Gape 12 

Garden 37 

Gargle 42 

Garrick . . 49 

Gasconade 66, 77 

Gather ...... 42, 43 

Gave 76 

Genealogy 68 

General 72 

Generally 47 

Genii 37 

Genoese 46 

Geometry ...... 51 

Geranium 40 

German 60 

Gestures 63 

Get 52 

Ghost 20 

Ghastly 7 

Gibberish 42 

Girl 56 

Girlish 66 

Girth 68 

Gist 48 

Give 26 5 65 

Gold 32 

Gondola 77 

Good 15 

Government .... 44 
Gourd 20 



127 



Gown . .. . 15 

Gradatory 46 

Gradually.... 62, 76 

Grammar 12, 83 

Granary 59 

Grass 79 

Gratis 3, 72 

Grenadiers 44 

Gridiron l4 

Grievous 66 

Groat 26 

Groundsel 56 

Guernsey 61 

Guildhall 8 

Guile 53 

Guillotined 42 

Gust 67 

Guttural 62 

Gymnastics. ..... 32 

Habeas corpus . . 13 

Hagnail 76 

Halfpence 4 

Halfpenny 7 

Handkerchief 15, 27,31 

Hansel 13 

Halloo 21, 53 

Hamburg- 79 

Haphazard ...... 57 

Harlequin 17 

Harsh 28 

Hasp 31 



Haunch 4 

Haunted 13 

Heard 11,40 

Heaved 12 

Heft 3 

Height 29, 33 

Heighten ...... 36 

Heinous 49 

Held,.. 58 

Helots 82 

Her 21 

Herculean ...... 55 

Hereditary 13 

Hermaphrodite . . 67 

Herrings 72 

Hideous 10 

Highlander 23 

Highlands 23 

Him 15 

Hindmost 24 

Hint 20, 40 

His 21 

Hit 34 

Hogshead 25 

Hold 8, 65 

Holy 21 

Hoist 50 

Horizon 7 

Hovered 46 

How 22 

However 20 

Humorous ...... 21 

Hustings. ....... 33 



128 



Hyde 50 

Hyperbole 13 

Hvperborean .... 71 

Idea 9 

Illness 71 

Immediately .... 53 

Immense 38 

Impeached S4 

Impetus 72 

Implement 15 

Impolite 5/ 

Importance 43 

Importuned 52 

Impossible 14 

Impotent 47 

Imprimis 68 

Improper 64 

Improvement .... 79 

Imprudent ' 64 

Imputed 25 

Incapable 39 

Incendiaries .... 69 
Incomparable .... 32 
Iucongruous .... 75 
Inconveniency. .... 34 
Inconvenient .... 11 
Ineontrovertibly. . 37 
Indecorously ... - 60 

India . . . ." 7 

India rubber .... 13 

Indicted 71 

Indies 24 

Indisputable .... 44 



Industry 5 

Inexorable 48 

Infinitum 31 

Inherent 30 

Iniquity 37 

Initials 61 

Injurious 48 

Insinuating 1 61 

Insists 28 

Instead 72 

Instep 42 

Insult 45 

Interference .... 32 
Interpolation .... 67 

Intoxicated 20 

Inveigled 17 

Inventory 64 

Ipse dixit 42 

Irascible 51 

Iron 38 

Irony 44 

Irrelevant 29 

Irreparable 40 

Irrevocable 75 

Isolated 46 

Item 20 

Jalap 33 

January 12 

Jerk 33 

Jaundice 66 

Jaunt 66 

Jeopardy 58 

Join ." 24 



129 



Joiner 24 

Joint 24 

Jonquil 36 

Juncture 25 

Just 11, 18 

Kennel 11 

Ketchup 34 

Kettle 42 

Kiln 51 

Know 43 

Knowledge 52 

Koran 83 

Laboratory 72 

Udder 14 

Lamentable 6 

Lamentation .... 10 

Lather 58 

Launch 9 

Laundry 59 

Laughter 61 

Leaden 65 

Leaped 43 

Learned .... 41?, 68 

Least 34 

Leave 46, 49 

Lecture 79 

Ledge 50 

Leg-ate 18 

Legends 31 

Leisure 41 

Length 57 

Let 50 



Libertine 62 

Led...... 50 

Lie 50 

Lief 42, 80 

Lien 80 

Lieutenant 40 

Lifeguard 60 

Lightsome 48 

Lighted 22 

Like 43 

Lilac 22 

Lineaments 48 

Liquid 52 

Liquidated 79 

Liquorice 14 

Literature 23 

Litharge 23 

Little 18 

Livelihood 23 

Livelong 53 

Loamy 21 

Loathe 18, 26 

Loins 6 

Loiter 47 

London 21 

Look 23 

Lover 19 

Ludicrous 10 

Lukewarm 3 

Lunatic 46 

Lunge 80 

Lustful 71 

Luxnrv 63 



130 



INDEX. 



Lying 61 

Lying 1 in 4 

Machinations 14, 46 

Mackerel 57 

Made 54 

Madrid 72 

Magistrate 27 

Magnesia 80 

Mahomet 14 

Maintenance .... 34 

Malcontents .... 24 

Manes 65 

Manger 29 

Mandamus 43 

Marbles 29 

Margin 20 

Maritime 41 

Marrowfats .... 82 

Marsh ' 61 

Marshes 46 

Marshmallows .. 18 

Mass 61 

Masses 61 

Mascnline 18 

Massacre 4 

Masticate . . • 28 

Matron 5 

Matter 21,73 

Mayoralty 49 

Mausoleum 52 

Means 43 

Medicine 4,51 

Melancholy. . ;; . 27 



Memoirs 68 

Memorandnm .... 68 

Menagerie 59 

Mercantile ...... 3 

Merchandize .... 66 

Merchant 14 

Mermaid 18 

Meshes 71 

Messages 63 

Mews 16 

Mezzotint 65 

Milan .. 72 

Military 39 

Mind 11 

Miniature . 69 

Minuet 50 

Minutiae 80 

Miracle 14 

Misanthropist .... 39 

Miscellany 59 

Mischierous .... 97 

Miscreant 26 

Miss of 28 

Mistress 59 

Mixture 62 

Moan 68 

Moist 30 

Moisten 71 

Molest 19 

Momentous 41 

Monarchical .... 43 

Monumeut 62 

More nor ....... 16 



131 



Mortgaged 96 

Mountainous .... 14 

Mulatto 58 

Mummy 72 

Murky 79 

Muscovy 61 

Musician 17 

Mutinied 58 

Mutual 70 

Nankeen 69 

National ........ 4 

Nature 4 

Natural 30 

Necessitated .... 14 

Negotiation .... 47 

Negro 51 

Neither 31 

Nephew 31 

Never a one . . 8, 10 

New one 16 

Newfoundland . . 47 

Nominative .... 4 

Nonpareil 46 

Nonplus 61 

Nonplussed 20 

Nothing 40 

Notorious 23 

Nought 57 

Nowhere 59 

Nutriture 56 

Objection 64 

Oblige 54 

Obligated 5 



Obligatory 44 

Obstacle 23 

Obstreperous .... 15 

Occasion 50 

Off 77 

Oil 37 

Ointment 3 

Once 12 

One 63 

On 'em 63 

Onions 20 

On us 58 

On you 49 

Ophthalmia 5 

Ophthalmist .... 67 

Opodeldoc 79 

Opponent 43 

Opportune .. 18,65 

Optional 82 

Oratorios 46 

Orchestra 40 

Ordeal 78 

Ordinary 47 

Ordnance.. ...... 32 

Oriental 41 

Orion 46 

Orisons 35 

Orleau 50 

Ornament 65 

Ostler 81 

Other 18, 40 

Otto 7 

Overplus 78 



132 



Ought to 31 

Ours 22 

Owing- 64 

Ovsters 23 

Pacific 68 

Pageantry ...... 60 

Papists * 89 

Pantonine 27 

Paralytic. .... . 18 

Paragraph ...... 20 

Parentage ...... 70 

Parings 38 

Parochial 50 

Parse 75 

Particular 72 

Partition ...... J 5 

Partner .46 

Partnership .... 83 

Patent 34, 41 

Pater 83 

Pathetic .... 32, 54 

Patron 5, 83 

Patriot 38 

Patrole 37 

Paunch 68 

Pealed 57 

Peas 60 

Pedant 27 

Pedigree 50 

Pelt 37 

Penal 49 

Peninsula 77 

Percentage ...... 73 



Perceptible 55 

Peremptory .... 25 

Performed 68 

Peril 61 

Permit 67 

Perpetually 76 

Perquisites 31 

Periwinkle . 4 

Perseverance .... 60 

Persists 31 

Perspiration . . 25, 42 

Pert 16 

Perverse 3, 37 

Perusal 22 

Petersburg 79 

Phaeton 15 

Phalanx 83 

Phenomenon .... 44 
Phvsiognomy .... 48 
Philanthropies . . 55 

Phlegm 35 

Phlegmatic 37 

Physician 17 

Pickaback 73 

Picture 65 

Piece 80 

Pilloried 49 

Pillow 72 

Pincers 42 

Pinchbeck 42 

Pincushion 34 

Piracy 48 

Pith 38 



133 



Pivot 39 

Plaid 28 

Plaintiff ... 52,78 

Plait 42 

Plaited 42 

Plagiarism 25 

Plagiarist 23 

Platina 69 

Player 12 

Pleasure 11 

Plebeian . . 28 

Pleiades 78 

Plumb 63 

Plumped 17 

Poached 12 

Poignant . * 53 

Point . . 9, 2a 

Poised . . 54 

Poison 28 

Police 40 

Polygamy 53 

Portent 17 

Portmanteau .... 31 

Portsmouth 34 

Portugal .... 19 

Portuguese 40 

Posts 18 

Postponed . ... 21 

Potatoes 21 

Potentates 40 

Pour 72 

Practises 8 



Precedent 31 

Precedence 56 

Precipitate 48 

Preclude 32 

Premature 4 

Premises ........ 42 

Prepense 48 

Prerogative 46 

Presage 22 

Presumptuous. ... 44 

Pretext 69 

Privacy » 44 

Profile 76 

Process . .. 48 

Procession 34 

Prodigy 15 

Progress 65 

PrOmiscuons .... 50 
Pronunciation.... 32 

Prophecy 75 

Proprietor 20 

Proud 82 

Prow 56 

Prowess 56 

Prunes 42 

Prussians 65 

Puerile 20 

Puppet 83 

Purposes ........ 42 

Pursuant 74 

Pursued ........ 51 

Put 32 



134 



Pythagorean .... 14 

Quagmire 78 

Quarantine 23 

Quench 63 

Quid 37 

Radishes 37 

Raillery 53 

Raise 70 

Raisins 26 

Rasor 48 

Rasher 80 

Rather 15 

Ration 47 

Ratiocination .... 47 

Realm 34 

Realised 40, 52 

Really 21 

Reared 8, 21 

Rears 63 

Recoil 47 

Record 39 

Recover 71 

Recrimination .... 50 
Refrigeratory .... 61 
Refuse ...... 20,49 

Refusal 21 

Regret 48 

Regiment 6 

Regimental 53 

Remainder 22 

Reminiscence .... 57 
Remuneration .... 30 



Rennit 8 

Repertory 78 

Reservoir 31 

Resolve 59 

Resource 58 

Respectfully .... 13 

Respite 8 

RestiflF 6 

Reticule 61 

Retina 56 

Revenue 32 

Reverberation. ... 62 

Revolted 66 

Rheumatism .... 29 

Riband 8 

Ridicule 40,57 

Right 10 

Rind 51 

Rinse 56 

Rise 70 

Rising 80 

Rote 51 

Roll 58 

Romance 41 

Rome 41 

Rose 21 

Rosin 61 

Rotherhithe 6 

Route 83 

Rubbish 73 

Ruffles 69 

Ruffled 73 



135 



Ruined 20 

Rumbled 79 

Russians 66 

Sacrament 53 

Sicred 53 

Sacrifice 36 

Sacrilege 9 

Saint John 5 

Salad 4 

Saliva 37 

Sat 10, 13 

Satire 9 

Satirist 39 

Saturn 23 

Saucepan ........ 16 

Saucer .......... 16 

Saucy 16 

Sausages 41 

Saw him 15 

Says he 12 

Scalloped 74 

Sceptic 72 

Schedule 73 

Schism 46 

* Scholar 19 

Scissors 11 

Scrunched 23 

Scruff 7 

Semstress 60 

Sensitive 40 

Sepulchre ...... 5 



Sequences 79 

Seraglio 64 

Sermon 18 

Serjeant 51 

Served 34 

Service 18 

Servile 49 

Sewer • • 46 

Shafts 28 

Shadow 72 

Sheep 59 

Shoulders 3 

Shrimps 25 

Shrove 65 

Shutters 10 

Shuttlecock 37 

Sighing 65 

Signature 60 

Sight 61 

Simony 48 

Simultaneous .... 30 

Sinecure 75 

Sisserary 86 

Sit... 21,42, 50 

Situation 15 

Skate -34 

Skeleton 56 

Skim 8 

Skirmish 52 

Skit 32 

Sky 37 

Slay 54 



136 



Slap. 66 

Slippery ... 12 

Sluiced 62 

Smack . 72 

Smuggled .. 23 

Soldered 50 

Soldiers 68 

Solitary 20 

Solve 62 

Somewhat 50 

Somewhere 19 

Sophistry 9 

Southern 64 

Southwark 67 

Sovereign 62 

Spaniel 64 

Spank 72 

Specie 55 

Specific. . . ; . 40 

Specimen 18 

Sphere .... 37 

Spice 4 

Spill 53 

Spilt 22 

Spirit 7 

Spirted 72 

Spoiled 11,28 

Spoonsful 63 

Squeeze 17 

Stairs 51 

Stamping 39 

Stark 68 



Statue 69 

Statute 53 

Staunch 53 

Staves 72 

Steady 70 

Stereotype 18 

Sterling 54 

Stern 55 

Stigma 54 

Stinted 70 

Stipendiary 70 

Stirrup ." 8L 

Stomachic ....... 38 

Stone 47 

Strap 75 

Stunted 70 

Subaltern 44 

Subpoena 13 

Subjected 45 

Substantial 13 

Substantiate 67 

Subtraction 7 

Successively .... 13 

Such 28 

Suit 17 

Sufferings 24 

Suite 64 

Sulphureous .... 42 

Summoned 49 

Superintend 10 

Superduous ... 3. 



337 



Supernumerary .. 55 

Surely 25 

Syllabub 59 

Synod 58 

fringe 34 

Syrup b& 

Take and do .... 33 

Take on 25 

Talons 71 

Tap 30 

Tassels 30 

Tatters .. 46 

Taught 48, 51 

Teats 59 

Tedium 50 

Temper • • 10 

Temporal 50 

Temporary 54 

Tenet ...* 32 

Tepid 78 

Tergiversation .... 5 

Terrier 41 

Tetuan 51 

Texture 71 

Thank 41 

That there 11 

Theatre 6 

Theirs 22 

Thieved 46 

Thing 19 

Thirsty 71, 72 

This here 11 



Thrashed 31 

Thread 26 

Threats .. 27 

Threw.. 20, 23,46, 48 

Throbs 58 

Thrown 22 

Thwarts 17 

Tickle 45 

Timorous « 58 

Tobacco 9, 14 

Toil .. 29,59 

Tolled 62 

To and fro 25 

Topic . . 49 

Tottenham 37 

Towards ........ 6 

Town -. . 3 

Tour 32 

Tract ; 48 

Trait 26 

Transaction 33 

Transient 49 

Translated ....... 76 

Treble 26 

Tremendous .... 44 

Tremor 50 

Tressles 29 

Trevet 42 

Tribunal 57 

Triphthong .... 13 

Troth . . 56 

Tutor 83,56 



138 



Typhus 5 

Typical 58 

Typographical , -« . . 39 
Vaccillation . . 83, 39 

Vag-abond 56 

Vagrant 3 

Valentine 34 

Valour.. 27 

Valuation ...... 28 

Value 60 

Vampt 54 

Varmint 18 

Vase 68 

Vaults 66 

Venice 16 

Venial 29 

Venison . . . 4 

Venom 18 

Venture 16 

Veterinary 64 

Verdigris 64 

Verjuice 38 

Vicious 55 

Violent ... 32 

Viscera 55 

Viscount 55 

Vitriol 69 

Vituperation .... 54 

Vocation . . . 60 

Volunteers 61 

Unawares 39 

Undermined .... 29 



Undressed 49 

Unfit 41 

Unfortunate .... 48 

Universal 6 

Unknown 34 

Unparalleled .... 57 
Unseparated .... 57 

Until 5 

Upbraided 53 

Upward 52 

Upon ... 44 

Upset .... -.- 60 

Urchin 77 

Usually 7Q 

Wainscot 55 

Wallnuts 39 

Wan 15 

"Warts -. . 69 

Was 49 

Waster 30 

Wax 6 

Weal 82 

Weapon 30 

What 6 

Whatever 20 

Whealed 70 

While 5 

Whist ^3 

Whitlow 54 

Whitsun 30 

Whole 11, 15 

Whore ,...M 



131 



Widowhood 22 

Width 33 

Wife 23 

Willingly 42 

Wind 71 

Windpipe 46 

Wine 3 

Wish 65 

Wont 70 

Woman 13 

Wonted 64 

Working Jl 

World 80 

Worry 54 



Worship 66 

Wound 17, 75 

Wounded 11 

Wrapper 44 

Wreaked 54 

Wristband 82 

Wrists 23 

Yellow 75 

Yes 9 

Yonder 64 

Yours 22, 54 

Zed 63 

Zenith 47 

Zoology 29 



-»•#«— 



END OF INDEX. 



v OF c 

3INDERY 
1903 a 



w 




— ™ 



HI 



